Hello Kitty Hell

It seems that the Hello Kitty fans came out in force to keep me from smashing Hello Kitty voting 829 to 643 to save her. This show of unity for the one without a mouth has deeply moved me and made me re-evaluate my thoughts regarding Hello Kitty. I have been converted. I now see […]

It was a night on the couch in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag last night because I let a minor thought slip out of my mouth. I should know by now, but sometimes it just happens. My wife received an email with Hello Kitty made of Lego’s:

wife: “Isn’t she cute?!”
me: (under my breath) “very appropriate, […]

You know that Hello Kitty Hell is getting bad when my wife wants something Hello Kitty and I think, “Well, at least it’s not as bad as it could be.” That was my thought when she announced that she wanted the Hello Kitty roll-up piano:

While any normal person would take one look at that and […]

My wife has decided that we need a floor buffer…not any floor buffer, mind you, but a Hello Kitty floor buffer:

Now, I could go into a rant about how we don’t have any hard wood floors that need to be buffed in our house, but that is probably obvious to those of you that have […]

If anyone believed that Hello Kitty was after anything less than world domination, then this should help put things to rest. Not only has Hello Kitty started her own religion, she wants to dominate science as well. I mean, really, who in the world needs a Hello Kitty microscope?!?

Of course, my wife, who has absolutely […]

My wife’s computer add-ons keep getting worse. Now that it is getting warmer outside and she no longer needs the Hello Kitty foot warmers and Hello Kitty heated lap pad, she had to find something else for her computer usb ports. Thus, the Hello Kitty usb powered fish tank arrived at our house today:

I know, […]

I don’t get it (what a big surprise there) - why do women think it’s cute to have Hello Kitty on the ends of their fingers? Some more nails that my wife “just has to have”

I have nightmares about things like this…you know those ghost stories where a single hand comes after you? It becomes […]

If you just get out of prison and your buddies give you a Hello Kitty vibrator as a welcome back gift, what do you do with it? You modify it into a prison style tattoo gun of course:

photo copyright M. Pilmer MutatoVisual.com, used with permission
I think I have figured out a way to keep my […]

My wife announced last night that there are only Hello Kitty fans that visit this blog and my attempt to find others who are in Hello Kitty Hell or sympathise with me has been a failure. “Everyone loves Hello Kitty and it will never change!”
I tried to explain that while it may appear that the […]

I have been trying to avoid writing about this little piece of Hello Kitty Hell for awhile now, but people keep on sending me photos and links to it so I guess I should address it. Yes, my wife does have a Hello Kitty should massager - commonly known as a Hello Kitty vibrator. […]