Hello Kitty Rectal Thermometer

While I don’t condone any product displaying the Hello Kitty brand, if I did have to choose one, the Hello Kitty rectal thermometer would certainly be in the running:

Hello Kitty rectal thermometer

This product simply confirms what we all know Hello Kitty does to all of us on a daily basis, especially to those who live in Hello Kitty Hell. Nothing typifies the true nature of Hello Kitty like having to look at her “cute” face as it gets shoved up your…

Sent in by Victoria who deserves to have this used on her on a daily basis as punishment for ever thinking that bringing this to my attention could be a good idea or a beer for finding the most accurate Hello Kitty branded product ever. Probably both…

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33 Responses to Hello Kitty Rectal Thermometer

  1. Lizeth says:

    its not just a rectal thermometer. i have that for my daughter, and i use it under her arm, or you can also use it orally.

  2. Ashley says:

    omg id rather have a fever for the rest of my life than have to deal with that….im sure darlene would enjoy it though LMFAO

  3. mhkitty says:

    Oh my goodness, too funny!
    It’s a cute thermometer, but yeah, I’m not gonna use it there, the mouth works fine for me…

  4. Puppy says:

    @.@ I’ll stick with the plain white one thank you very much…

  5. andophiroxia says:

    I want darlene to lick the brown part. >:)

  6. mbbored says:

    Almost as bad as the Hello Kitty ear pick.


  7. bear_1 says:

    Here it is, undeniable proof that HK = a pain in the ass.

  8. mhkitty says:

    @bear_1: toooooo funnnyyy!
    Couldn’t have said it better myself ;)

  9. Your Mom says:

    LOL. I <3 rectal thermometers.

  10. Mari says:

    looks like a regular thermometer..still cute =)

  11. brien says:

    It would have to be a rectal thermometer, because as everyone knows …


  12. darlene says:

    Caught lying again! Can you ever report the truth instead of exaggerating? This is getting so tiring. This is a regular thermometer that can be used in the mouth or under the arm as well which you conveniently left out just to make your blog more vile. This time everyone knows you’re a liar.

    Hello Kitty is helping children’s health and all you can do is fixate on typical man gutter humor in a pathetic attempt to be funny. You are becoming so very sad and everyone can see it. It’s a surprise that anyone reads this blog anymore.

  13. Well Darlene certainly put you in your place Mister! BUSTED!

    Is she gone? Ok, I enjoy reading this blog because I love the tone of the writer- and Darlene cracks me up. Why do I read this blog? Well Darlene, you are a big factor! Oh she’s back?

    Yeah Mister and don’t try that again!

  14. jasmine cupcake says:

    its time for darlene needs to take the Rectal Thermometer out!


  15. Kelly says:

    Darlene needs one for her mouth AND for her rectum, that way none of her crap will be able to come out either end.

  16. Barrie says:

    I was gratified this last week as my niece turned down a HK toothbrush, offered by my sister, in favor of a superman toothbrush, offered by me. I was given a little glimmer of hope that my poor niece might escape one day from her own HK hell. I will avoid letting my sister see that thermometer, whichever orifice you shove it into, just as a safety measure for the child.

  17. Manders says:

    Hehehe. I stumbled upon your site while doing research on a pair of Converse basketball shoes for work. (Yay for google and its lack of appropriate results.) I just wanted to say that you’re hilarious (and the anti-sharing-HK-converse-wherabouts was awesome.) I don’t mind Hello Kitty but I think your site is great. Keep up the good work!

  18. Jennifer says:

    Is putting the cute widdle kitty on it supposed to make kids want something shoved up their bums?

  19. Tori says:

    Is it just me, or is it infuriating how people act like they are forced to visit this site? I’ve been reading the comments, and it’s sad. Someone commented on how it’s unfair how Hell Kitty Hell is ‘forcing their opinions on hello kitty lovers’. If you don’t like the site, don’t visit it! Darline, why do you keep coming here? Don’t you think it’s a little weird that someone who hates this site soo much feels compelled to comment frequently? (Almost) no one cares what you have to say, and you’re not taken seriously. I feel like saying this because I have a site myself, and have had people tell me how much they hate it – It makes me feel really awful to read those comments for a site I work so hard on. Even though I <3 hello kitty (notebooks, stickers, normal stuff), reading this blog is hilarious and entertaining. Sorry for such a long post, I’ve never commented before ^___^

  20. RSKS says:

    Those ARE rectal thermometers! the thin small ones and the ones that look like a skinny stick are the ones for the mouth darlene…..unless you “like” it for mutipul useage. They make them for specific ones for different areas, cause why the hell would anyone want to put something that has been in their butt in their mouth.

    (doesn’t matter if it was washed, it was still there)

  21. rbb says:

    Do you know how to tell an HK rectal thermometer from an HK oral thermometer?

    By the taste…

  22. Alfred says:

    My last G/F had a real beautiful butthole pink & starfish tight! <3

  23. Bytten says:

    I hate to say it, but it could be much worse. Imagine a Hello Kittyfied sigmoidoscope or colonoscope (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigmoidoscope) I’m glad my oncologist just uses a normal one…

  24. Ghod says:

    Darlene, you say this yet you leave comments on virtually every new blog? Get a new hobby.

  25. mhkitty says:

    Is anyone else truly disturbed by Alfred’s comment?????

  26. Hello Jessie says:

    I agree with mhkitty, WTF?

  27. mhkitty says:

    Dude, check the Bra Shop comments…. ick….

  28. e says:

    ugh…..i like hk but that is wtf status.

  29. Lulu says:

    I just checked out the link from mbbored, and caught of this:


    Who would even think up this product?

  30. Jekka says:

    ROFL someone tell me why it looks so long?

  31. Lulu says:

    OMG, all this time I’ve been putting that thermometer in my mouth.

  32. Mark says:

    I will admit that with its thin flexible tip I prefer having it used on my rectally than orally. My girlfriend used it on me and I didn’t even notice it going in. i heard the beep and she showed me what had just happened. Now I prefer that she take my temp that way.

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