Hello Kitty Haiku Book
Seriously, there is absolutely nothing that the Hello Kitty won’t try and stick her claws into. Apparently Japanese haiku poetry, through its long and illustrious history, was still missing something vitally important — the evil feline’s commercialization. She promptly resolved this oversight with a haiku poetry book titled Hello Kitty Through The Seasons:

You would think — being the normal, sane person that you are — that a single Hello Kitty haiku book would prove that there are just some things that Hello Kitty fanatics wouldn’t buy, but then you would be vastly underestimating the evil feline again. That’s because the first book was so successful that they came out with another Hello Kitty haiku book titled Hello Kitty Everywhere

With gems like the following inside, it’s amazing that the first book didn’t send the Hello Kitty fanatic masses to a sugary, diabetic death:
Storm of white sugar –
a wintery confection,
I sit happily
Of course, my wife loves it and is dutifully taking the steps necessary to add these two books to her collection. I, on the other hand, sit here thinking of how the above Hello Kitty haiku would go in real life:
Storm of white sugar -
Pepto Bismol pink frosting
Everyone vomits
These two books are making me seriously reconsider my thoughts on book burning…
Sent in by Alison (via haiku by two) who should have to include Hello Kitty in every one of the haiku she writes in the future as punishment for every thinking that bringing these to my wife’s attention could be a good thing.
Popularity: 7% [?]
Posted: November 5th, 2009 under Hello Kitty Strange.
Comments: 22
Comments
#1 Comment from Kitty
Time: November 5, 2009, 11:03 am
Burn the books, burn the house, burn Sanrio. Hell just burn everything until the cleansing flames bring releif to us all.
#2 Comment from better u than me
Time: November 5, 2009, 11:48 am
Hee, hee! Just when I think I’ve seen everything…..
#3 Comment from Gail
Time: November 5, 2009, 8:12 pm
I like the little pink poodle!
#4 Comment from SHEENA
Time: November 5, 2009, 10:58 pm
Your POEM is pretty fun ny. lol
#5 Comment from Catbunny
Time: November 5, 2009, 11:34 pm
To quote a friend’s T-shirt:
Haiku isn’t hard
Sometimes it just makes no sense
Refrigerator
#6 Comment from acton
Time: November 6, 2009, 1:41 am
His fiery blast
Like a summer scoring wind
Cannot hurt Kitty
#7 Comment from Kitteh!!
Time: November 6, 2009, 1:46 am
Hello Kitty at the beach
Wearing a bikini and sun-tanned
You can not unsee this
#8 Comment from Kitteh!!
Time: November 6, 2009, 7:41 am
Hello Kitty Parisienne
A Beret and a Smock
The Eiffel Tower loses
#9 Comment from Sharon
Time: November 6, 2009, 10:51 am
Burn Hello Kitty
Clouds of Pepto Bismol smoke
Sanity returns
#10 Comment from darlene
Time: November 6, 2009, 11:17 am
Clueless blogger man
Doesn’t know Hello Kitty
Posts are like vomit
#11 Comment from acton
Time: November 6, 2009, 11:26 am
Like a tornado
Comments post in raging hate
Why so much in vain.
#12 Comment from Sharon
Time: November 7, 2009, 1:31 am
Because name of blog
Hello Kitty Hell. Simple.
Get a clue people.
#13 Comment from Sarah
Time: November 7, 2009, 6:52 am
Kitty overlord
Logo plasters the whole world
Oh god, it burns us!
#14 Comment from Jaime
Time: November 7, 2009, 2:25 pm
that’s a really good haiku you wrote!
#15 Comment from ericka
Time: November 9, 2009, 12:03 am
hey i have those two books.
#16 Comment from Kitteh!!
Time: November 9, 2009, 1:59 am
Hello Kitty haiko books
An inspiration to one and all
Even Darlene joins in
#17 Comment from a.
Time: November 9, 2009, 2:14 am
Since when does fur tan in the sun?
#18 Comment from Asato Fuyutsuki
Time: November 9, 2009, 6:35 pm
Winter moon on branch
White cat with eyes like holes
I gotta be crazy
#19 Comment from acton
Time: November 10, 2009, 12:53 am
Lightning and thunder
Kitty Haters in toment
Male fans do exist.
#20 Comment from Kitteh!!
Time: November 10, 2009, 2:00 am
Fur does not tan in Sun
Hello Kitty is not a real cat
We joke in Japan verse.
#21 Comment from mhkitty
Time: November 12, 2009, 6:28 am
I have this book! It’s been out for a WHILE!
I figured you’d already ranted about this…
#22 Comment from mhkitty
Time: November 12, 2009, 6:29 am
@Catbunny:
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!

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