Hello Kitty Hell

You would think that life in the US would be less Hello Kitty Hellish than in Japan, but you’d be wrong. My wife has discovered that in the US she can watch the Hello Kitty Furry Tail Series over and over again. Don’t think it could be that bad? Try watching for 5 minutes without wishing that a large space object of any kind would fall out of the sky and put you out of your misery.

Oh, it gets much worse. There were 13 episodes created before someone realized that the human race was seriously considering self mass extinction and had the good sense to stop the agony being inflicted upon everyone. Unfortunately, he did not have the good sense to destroy all the previous episodes created which severely detracted from the good karma he had received for stopping the episodes in the first place. This is because now those who live with Hello Kitty fanatics have to watch the same 13 episodes over and over again which can arguably be even worse:

Hello Kitty fanatics, sensing the sheer terror that non Hello Kitty fanatics immediately display whenever the topic of watching these videos comes up have turned it into an easy way to get anything they want done around the house.

wife: “The fence needs fixing.”

me: “I’m a bit tired. Give me a second to rest. I’ll get to it in a little bit.”

wife: “Oh, if you have some extra time and want to relax, I’m just about to sit down and watch Wizard of Paws. You’re free to join me.”

me: (Getting up and sprinting toward the garage to get the tools I need to fix the damn fence thinking “Anything with the title Wizard of Paws is sure to do irreparable brain damage”) “Never mind, honey, I will get right on that fence mending…”

Sent in by kristin who should be forced to watch every episode multiple times as punishment for introducing my wife to these videos’ existence and for ever thinking that sending them to me could result in anything but extreme distress…

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