Hello Kitty Hell

Was there ever really any doubt? Wii had already started to produce official Hello Kitty Wii related items and fans were doing things that just weren’t right with Hello Kitty Wii mods. So I guess it’s not going to be too much longer until I walk home and my Wii controllers and Wii console looks [...]

We already have a Hello Kitty scale, but that doesn’t stop my wife from wanting other ones that she comes across. I find the whole idea rather ironic since the last thing that my wife wants to know from the evil feline is what she weighs. It wouldn’t surprise me if the Hello Kitty digital [...]

One would think that the evil feline would be satisfied after convincing guitar makers to sell their souls and produce both Hello Kitty acoustic guitars and Hello Kitty electric guitars (not to mention what happens when people actually play them or even worse, pretend to play them). This, of course, would be greatly underestimating the [...]

I’m not sure what disturbs me more – that Hello Kitty bongs exist or that there are several variations of them. Apparently, when a standard Hello Kitty bong is not high class enough for some Hello Kitty fanatics, they go out and make something a little more upscale like a Hello Kitty Louis Vuitton bong. [...]

When rock climbing, putting your life in the hands of the evil feline’s bow is a pretty good way to assure you’ll end up under a Hello Kitty tombstone. Of course, you know that since Hello Kitty is making these, it’s only a matter of time before they are offering a full size Hello Kitty [...]

Here’s this week’s Hello Kitty photo dump of photos sent in that didn’t make the front page of this blog: Hello Kitty Uterus Plush Hello Kitty Guitar Meow! Hello Kitty Jelly Belly Jelly Beans Hello Kitty Cat Litter Hello Kitty Asics Shoes Hello Kitty MP3 Player And a few photo post updates: Hello Kitty Darth [...]

I received the following question in my email the other day: What are the worst Hello Kitty products out there? “Everything?” would be my immediate response. That being said, many of the things that I personally find horrifying never seemed to raise much of a ruckus among the readers here and the Hello Kitty fanatics [...]

I have absolutely no idea why the Hello Kitty toaster is such a popular appliance with Hello Kitty fanatics (quit sending photos of it to me!). There really is nothing that’s more dreadful than having Hello Kitty staring back at you in the morning when you still aren’t awake, especially when it is accompanied by [...]

It’s never a good day when a celebrity is caught showing off some type of Hello Kitty product and then that photo is sent to me. In the mind of the Hello Kitty fanatic, this somehow legitimizes Hello Kitty. This is my wife’s reasoning — if Anna Paquin is riding around on her Hello Kitty [...]

I should have learned by now that it’s never a good idea to make a random comment about something I want since I live in Hello Kitty Hell. I have been doing more traveling lately which has had me thinking that I really need to buy a netbook so I don’t have to haul around [...]

Once again showing that she can’t keep her claws off of anything that is remotely popular, Hello Kitty seems to have set her sights on the Nintendo Wii gaming system. The people at Sanrio know that there is absolutely no way that any Hello Kitty fanatic will be able to resist the Hello Kitty Wii [...]

Because nothing shows the true cuteness and sweet side of Hello Kitty — and the love and happiness she brings to all — as 50,000 volts of electricity streaming through your body:

My wife already has a Hello Kitty cell phone which has embarrassed me to no end, but in the land of Hello Kitty fanatics, extreme Hello Kitty gaudiness is never enough. Eventually someone will come along with a Hello Kitty cell phone that is gaudier than your own:

You knew that it would eventually have to happen. Having already Hello Kittified virtually every real gadget out there, the evil feline has decided that it’s necessary to take the next logical step in her plot to take over the world — invent random gadgets that make no sense at all, but which she knows [...]

What happens when you have a Hello Kitty fanatic that’s a techie who needs a graduation gift and a boyfriend too clueless to know that encouraging the Hello Kitty fanatic is worse than playing with radioactive material? You get something not very pretty like this Hello Kitty Lineman’s Handset:

Although I have suspected it for some time, I am now convinced that there is a special unit at Sanrio that makes Hello Kitty items with the sole purpose being to irritate the hell out of the significant others of Hello Kitty fanatics. In fact, it would not surprise me if they have it nicknamed [...]

Hello Kitty couldn’t leave hands free house clean-up with the Hello Kitty robomop and decided that they also needed to have a Hello Kitty Roomba:

While there are many things that trouble me in Hello Kitty Hell, whenever it has to do with my wife’s Hello Kitty cell phone I have no other choice but cringe. That’s exactly what I did when she discovered the Hello Kitty disposable solar cell phone charger:

One would assume that one Hello Kitty TV would be enough. Of course, that in no way dissuaded Sanrio from making another Hello Kitty TV. Or a third and fourth Hello Kitty TV as well. So, there really should be no surprise that there is a new Hello Kitty LCD TV that has recently been [...]

It’s really not like my wife needs to pimp out her cell phone in Hello Kitty anymore than it already is, but then that simple piece of logic never makes any sense to a Hello Kitty fanatic. Thus she has her eyes on a $462 (50,000 yen) 18k gold (1.8 grams) Hello Kitty phone strap [...]