As if there was really a need to have one more reason to want this season to end as quickly as possible (see Hello Kitty Christmas trees and Hello Kitty ornaments if you had any doubts), this should quickly put the question to rest: a Hello Kitty Christmas music video that is guaranteed to haunt you long after the new year begins (you have been warned)

I did warn you. If you happened to not heed my advice, you now know that both your ears and eyes have experienced far more trauma than they were ever meant to endure which pretty much sums up the entire Hello Kitty Christmas experience.

Sent in by Maria from Hello Kitty Junkie who makes a cameo appearance in the video. The video was also filmed filmed at her apartment which is obviously another den of Hello Kitty Hellishness…

Leave it to Hello Kitty fanatics to not have the patience (or common decency) to start sending me horrible reminders of what the next month is going to be like in Hello Kitty Hell. First there was the Hello Kitty Christmas tree which soon lead to another Christmas tree before the floodgates opened (which created a strong case in favor of those who believe the world isn’t worth saving). Was there really any doubt that there would be more Hello Kitty Christmas trees?

Obviously there is one more person that needs to be added to the Hello Kitty Hall of Shame who has that look of wanting to go on a huge killing rampage for being forced to take the photo (is he holding Hello Kitty or getting ready to gut her?) It certainly seems that far too many are being forced to join me in Hello Kitty Hell…

Sent in by Carrie

Update: More horrendousness

Sent in by hkpepper

Sent in by Marna

We all instinctively know that Hello Kitty guns are an extremely bad idea. There is no need to show us. In fact, we also know instinctively that if we did see a fanatic with guns that we would cringe in the best case scenario and our brains would be scarred for life in the worst. This photo dramatically shows us the worst case scenario:

This could actually be an effective way for the anti gun lobby to find success against the NRA. If this doesn’t encourage legislatures to make laws promoting gun control, I don’t know what ever would…

Sent in by Nuggsandjuggs

While all seasons suck when you live in Hello Kitty Hell, the end of the year is the worst. I know immediately when October arrives because people start sending me stuff like Hello Kitty Halloween costumes and Hello Kitty pumpkins. And that is just the tip of the iceberg of the Hello Kitty Halloween crap that exists out there. To perfectly illustrate this point, I present the exclusive Hello Kitty Build-A-Bear Halloween orange witch:

I readily admit that I don’t get Build-A-Bear. This is probably not much of a surprise since I do not get Hello Kitty and they seem to be about on par with each other when it comes to absolute annoying uselessness. As far as I can tell, you take the dead carcass of a stuffed animal and, instead of ripping the head off and putting the poor thing out of its misery, you stuff it with a bunch of synthetic crap so that it has to suffer for an extended period of time on a shelf in a corner of your room somewhere. Once stuffed, and thinking that its life could never get any worse, you buy it all kinds of ridiculous clothing and accessories (that just happen to cost more than real clothing and accessories) to ensure the poor plush will live the rest of its life in complete humiliation..

Combine this Build-A-Bear absurdity with Hello Kitty and the pain rises to a level that you actually wish you had access to a Hello Kitty gun to be able to put yourself out of your misery. And to think, the Hello Kitty Hellish season has just begun…

Sent in by Elaine

Since anyone living in Hello Kitty Hell knows never to underestimate the lengths that a Hello Kitty fantatic will go to create Hello Kitty tattoo combinations that will almost certainly haunt them (and us) for the rest of their lives, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that some of these fanatics will take the horror they create a step further. While it’s obvious to anyone with even an ounce of sanity that the Hello Kitty Hannibal Lecter tattoo should have been the end (or rather, never even contemplated) of this evil feline mashup, we are talking about a Hello Kitty fanatic here. Thus, the obviousl next step was to create a Hello Kitty Hannibal Lecter plush:

Of course, the scary part of all this is that despite already having gone way past anything that makes a rational human being comfortable, this is not likely to be the end (although we all should hoping that Hello Kitty does eventually end up in these restraints). I am expecting to see Hello Kitty Hannibal Lecter standing proudly by Hello Kitty Darth Vader next October…

Left by Raquel Schleimer on facebook (via her website Monsterami)

Every time it gets to the point where I believe that things can never get worse, the evil feline makes sure to let me know that Hello Kitty Hell can always get worse. It is distressing (and more than a little disturbing) that I still have people asking me where they can find Hello Kitty Converse shoes 4 years after first posting about them (not to mention Hello Kitty fanatics wishing me dead for refusing to tell them where my wife got them).

Once the people at Sanrio saw all the fuss these were causing, they decided that Hello Kitty x shoes was an impossible to lose combination which lead to unfortunate creations such as Hello Kitty Asics shoes, Hello Kitty Reebok shoes and Hello Kitty Nike shoes (not to mention Hello Kitty bowling shoes and Hello Kitty heels)

Any normal person would imagine that Sanrio had fully exploited this combo, but it now appears that they have just started by adding another horrifying aspect to the mix. Instead of leaving bad enough alone at Hello Kitty x Reebok, the powers driving Hello Kitty Hell decided that to really torture most of us, a Hello Kitty x Reebok x plush combination was somehow a good idea:

If anyone ever sees a Hello Kitty fanatic wearing a apir of these on the street, feel free to put their significant other out of his misery because there is no doubt that is the only thing that he is desperately hoping for with every step he takes together with her…

Sent in by B

Of all living things on earth that may have a comparable Hello Kitty Hell to my own, the closest may be the dogs of Hello Kitty owners. When your owner thinks it’s a good idea to give you a Hello Kitty ID tattoo or simply dress you up like this (or this or this or this — it is quite sad that I could keep going on and on), being a dog owned by a Hello Kitty fanatic can’t be an easy life.

Knowing this, it becomes plainly obvious when a creature did something beyond evil in their past life, and now the karma has come back to haunt them in their new form. There is no other explanation when you see a photo like this:

Shouldn’t someone be calling the humane society?

Sent in by Stephanie who I would wish unthinkable punishment upon, but have a feeling that her Yorkie already has plans far more sinister and painful than I could ever come up with as revenge for doing this…

One would assume that after the Hello Kitty latex bed there would have been enough Hello Kitty kink for the week, but then that would be greatly underestimating how much Hello Kitty loves her sex. This was made readily apparent when I found out that the Hello Kitty S&M love hotel existing was not enough, and someone felt it essential to build another Hello Kitty bondage room:

While I certainly could see how Yoshi would enjoy finding Hello Kitty bound and gagged, I can’t say that I feel the same way. I say this with fear in my voice because I know that if I ever end up in a room like this, I will have something like this looking over me, undoubtedly holding a Hello Kitty flogger in hand. When it is possible for my scariest nightmares to become reality, I know that things are getting worse in Hello Kitty Hell…

Sent in by Joseph (via Kitacon) who should be forced to use the room Hello Kitty bondage room with his girlfriend as punishment for bringing my fears to life and for ever thinking that sending this to me would result in anything positive…

Apparently Bratz doesn’t feel that Barbie should be the only one to get to wear the dress. It really doesn’t make a difference what doll is wearing it. It’s going to give the average non Hello Kitty fanatic nightmares…

Sent in by tiff (via veik11 – used with permission)

What is worse than Lady Gaga dressed in a Hello Kitty plush dress? The thought of a line of Lady Gaga Barbies wearing that Hello Kitty plush dress:

My wife took one look at this and thought it was the greatest thing ever (The fact that not every Hello Kitty item can be “the greatest thing ever” seems to be one of those impossibilities that Hello Kitty fanatics conveniently ignore), and thinks it would make a wonderful addition to her collection. I think that when you take three wrongs (Lady Gaga + Barbie + Hello Kitty) and combine them together, they not only don’t make a right, but you have basically set in motion the conditions for the human race to give up all hope. That’s certainly the point in Hello Kitty Hell I reached when I saw it…

Sent in by tiff (via veik11 – used with permission) who should have to spend her life creating Hello Kitty Lady Gaga Barbies as punishment for ever thinking that sending me this photo could ever be a good idea…