HKH FAQs
It is a sad day in Hello Kitty Hell when I actually have to create a frequently asked questions area due to all the crap that ends up in my email from Hello Kitty fanatics asking the same questions over and over again.
If you hate Hello Kitty so much, why did you marry someone that you knew loved Hello Kitty?
I think that this whole blog is fake.
I really don’t care.
Prove that this blog isn’t fake.
Done.
You could have gotten those photos of the bathroom anywhere. You probably got them from another website.
I could have, but I didn’t. If you think I did, show me the website.
I’m fascinated by those bathroom pictures. Can you take some more?
I can, but I won’t. Not worth the time or effort.
Your refusal to take more photos of the bathroom to prove that it is really yours proves that it isn’t. Caught in your own lie. hahaha
Thank you for perfectly illustrating the true deductive reasoning of Hello Kitty fanatics…
Is Darlene your wife?
No.
who is darlene?
Obviously someone new to this blog. Browse and read the comments. It won’t take you long to find out.
How do you feel when darlene attacks your masculinity and puts all this ridiculous stuff into your blog even when your only trying to vent?
I feel fortunate as I realize that no matter how bad my Hello Kitty Hell is, it could be worse.
Does your wife read this blog?
Rarely. When she does, I usually end up on the couch in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag.
Is this blog just a way of venting, or are you hoping to achieve something else with it?
Venting.
Do you remember the thing your wife bought that finally set you off the deep end?
Hello Kitty pancake maker.
Did you Get Rid of 200 the Hello Kitty Items? When we can see the pics?
Yes.
Do you fit in the HK sleeping bag? Is not so small for you?
No. I unzip it so it’s more like a blanket most of the time.
What’s the weirdest HK thing (not necessarily something you’ve posted on this blog) that your wife has bought that she has absolutely no use for?
That pretty much sums up everything Hello Kitty
Can say one good thing about Hello Kitty?
My image of Hello Kitty, no matter how terrible, is better today than it will undoubtedly be tomorrow.
Why don’t you allow your wife to post somewhere to tell her side of the story?
Because it’s not her blog?
Why don’t you take original photos for you blogs so that we know that your blogs are real?
Because it’s not worth the time or effort
Don’t you think you are immature to insult the people who send photos that help make your site interesting?
No.
What would you do if they stopped sending you photos and you had nothing to blog about?
Celebrate?
Why do you lie about Hello Kitty so much?
Apparently, I see the world a bit differently than you…
Don’t you think it’s disrespectful to your wife to constantly put down something she loves?
No, it’s honest.
Why are you so insecure of your masculinity to not be able to wear anything Hello Kitty?
See, I knew I would regret this…
How often does it occur to you that you’re promoting Hello Kitty by keeping this blog? (-:
It doesn’t. Then again, I don’t think like a Hello Kitty fanatic…
What do your friends think of your wife’s Hello Kitty obsession?
They think “Wow, my life could be a whole lot worse. Thank your wife for making me realize this.”
Can you tell us how you and your wife met?
My private life, with the exception of instances that relate to Hello Kitty and therefore this blog, is exactly that.
Can you list any redeeming qualities that your wife has?
See above. If it doesn’t have to do with Hello Kitty and my rants, it doesn’t go up on this blog.
You are the biggest pussy whipped guy I have ever seen. Why don’t you grow some balls and just divorce your wife?
And you, dear reader, are an ignorant idiot. You read about a tiny slice of my life and decide that from that you have the right to tell me how to live it and what I should do? Quite frankly, it’s none of your damn business, but when you agree to tell me about one part of your life and from that, I get to determine what you should do in every other aspect your life, then I’ll gladly answer this question for you.
Are there Hello Kitty products that are not worth the time to blog about?
I blog about less than 10% of the Hello Kitty products that end at my house or in my email box.
What has this site done for you?
It’s a blog where I rant about Hello Kitty. Nothing more, nothing less.
What are you accomplishing by ranting?
I keep my sanity. Obviously, many people take this blog much more seriously than I do…
If you hate Hello Kitty so much, why do you spend so much time blogging about her?
I spend very little time on this blog.
If you’re so anti Hello Kitty, then why do you have advertisements on your website selling Hello Kitty stuff? Isn’t that a bit hypocritical?
Because Hello Kitty fanatics don’t know how to use Google and it helps keep their whining requests out of my email box.
Did you ever think that your blog could reach so many people of so many parts of the world and so many different interests?
It has revealed that there are far too many Hello Kitty fanatics in the world.
How long have you been living in Hello Kitty Hell?
A couple years longer than this blog has existed.
Are there any items left in your house that haven’t been kittified yet?
Yes, but my wife is dutifully working on it.
How do you keep your home clean if you have so much HK stuff?
Lots of Hello Kitty cleaning supplies…
How did you avoid getting signed up for the Hello Kitty online beta?
Even my wife realises that there is no freakin way I’ll spend my free time on a Hello Kitty online game.
Do you ever want to just put a bullet in your head from all the dumb questions and dumber HK items that are made?
Everyday, but then I remember I’ll likely be buried under a Hello Kitty tombstone and I resist.
Is there any HK thing on earth that you may possibly like? I mean those really produced by Sanrio.
No.
Does your wife have a blog?
No, thank god…
How much do you think your wife spends on hello kitty every year?
I don’t think as this would undoubtedly send me someplace where they have Hello Kitty straight jackets…
Can we see a picture of the happy couple?
No — I’d rather my face not be associated with Hello Kitty in any way…
Comments
Pingbacks
-
[...] is married to a Hello Kitty entrepreneur and it’s driving him up the wall. Just reading the Hello Kitty Hell FAQ had me busting my gut with laughter. Walk Through The [...]
-
[...] HKH FAQs [...]
i’m an avid reader of your blog and been keeping up with updates for over the past year. i just wanted to tell you that i especially love this FAQ section of yours. i can tell that u and your wife are great people with a side-splitting sense of humour! great wishes to you both!
Keep up all the great work!
Ignore Darlene.
Burn the sleeping bag!
oooh i have a question!! how much do you think your wife spends on hello kitty every year?
you are a horrible person and i hope you life is horrible for hating hello kitty. i don’t even know your wife but i like her more then you do. hello kitty is wonderful and many people love her and you putting her down has brought you what you are in.a so called hello kitty hell, which is impossible. she is my favorite thing EVER and i have hello kitty everything, and if you have such a big problem with you and your wife you should fix you own problems and not whine to others. i have seen some bad things said about hello kittty, but this is stupid. you must have no life complaining about hello kitty all the time. whatever if you think it, but there is no need for a blog of ridculousness and stupidity. i hpoe you wife never stops buying and keeps you in your so called “hell” forever.
OMG! I’m a hello kitty fan but I am not this crazy about her! Oh,BTW, none, shut up! If you want to be this negative go find a hello kitty pinata and beat on her!! Gosh, just because you hate your life doesn’t mean you have to take it out on everyone else.
Hello Sir-
I googled Hello Kitty because my niece really likes the character,and I am trying to find a gift. I clicked on your site, not really knowing what it would be, but, HOLY COW!
Your blogging may just be your blah, blah, venting but…. HILARIOUS! And I don’t think you are even trying to be funny (which makes it even funnier!)
I’ll admit, I think the little feline is kinda cute, but I rarely see the character in my everyday life. I found myself wondering …if you dream of her….
Oh well, your life could be worse – at least your wife makes money from her hobby. Some people collect even more ridiculous characters just to have them!
May you have a great devoid of Hello Kitty day !-)
See, this is the downside to HKH… the ‘darlenes’ and ‘nones’ of the world that have to be mean and say stuff to Mr. HKH… he’s just having fun.
And who’s he hurting? NO ONE!
Get over and take a pill to make to voices go away already.
be grateful you haven’t moved into Hannah Montana Hell
Hey awesomely funny site. I do realize its not so funny to you though, and i wanted to ask you…if your wife knows you suffer so from this hello kitty thing, why doesnt she try to tone it down for your sake? just like you have tried to put up with it?
I truly believe this is the funniest stuff I have read in a long time!!!! I am v much a lover of all things kitsch & I totally adore HK- but jeez I HAD no idea there were people out there so completely obsessed…. Its down right frieky & scary…. Are there HK group meetings & HK gangs?? Er, why would you want to own a HK washing machine???…. A toy one for a kid maybe but…. & please the wedding cake thing is just too much…. I would just want to demolish it… Listen, am not going to bitch but I am totally amazed that the whole HK thing has been taken to another level & hats off to Sanrio- those smart guys are just laughing all the way to the bank… Plus, I think Betty Boop is much cooler- she’s sexy & vampy & in your face… Too much sweet stuff like HK eventually gives you tummy ache methinks… Anyhow, your wife has been a source of inspiration for you & you love her & all her frieky HK stuff-for sure!!! Without her obsession you’d probably not have very much to write about… Am sure she has a cute girly g string that makes you go all the way out of HK hell into HK paradise!!!! Prove me wrong!!!
I love this blog. I love Hello Kitty but I know when to quit. Thanks to you and your wife for the laughs!
Awww I really love this blog. Thank you guy, you are just sooo sweet.
Kudos for taking the time to make people laugh and reminding us not to take life so serious..
As a Kitty fan…I love your blog….keep up the good work.
i liked your answers alot clean but blunt…
Why do you have a FAQ?
Have you always hated Hello Kitty as much as you do now? Or was it after you got married to your wife that you truly began to resent her?
Hello Hell living guy,
I bought a cute hk sleeping tshirt in an hk bag the other day. My 4 yr old son was in the cart as usual. To keep him quiet, I jokingly let him hold the bag while I continued shopping. Now he thinks it’s HIS! He wants me to go back and buy another one in the other color for HIM! I am shocked that he was paying such close attention that he knew there are TWO colors! HALP! He actually put the thing on his arm like a girl and said he wanted to go shopping! WHAT HAVE I DONE???!!! Fortunately, his Dad returned from a trip and will do guy stuff with him. The bag is going to be HIDDEN somewhere. I always said, if my son were gay I’d be ok with it. Yeah, RIGHT!! You have my sympathy. Fight on, dude.
This made me laugh! Ha ha! No one seems to understand the hell you live in. No one also seems to understand that just because you despise your wifes pasion doesnt mean you cant love eachother!
I enjoy reading your blogs, and I think you have a better sense of humor about it all than you let on. By the way, I am a guy with a few Hello Kitty items, but only because I really like cats in general – she joins a feline menagerie of Bast, Neko, Garfield, stuffed tigers, African wood carvings, Mexican pottery, ceramics and resin, etc.
your whole blog is about hello kitty yet you hate her wtf
I don’t really care for hello kitty, but I needed a costume for halloween and I decided to be Hello Kitty. So i’m searching for ideas la di da and I stumbled upon your blog. I think i’m going to get fired from work because I keep reading it and not doing my work. You are too funny. I can’t believe people really love hello kitty so much. Weird.
I’ve loved Hello Kitty since 1986, the year my daughter was born. I still love Hello Kitty and so does my daughter. My daughter and I enjoy your blog and laugh alot, thank you.
Absolutely hilarious even if I can’t help but wince in sympathy for the hell in question. Keep up the good work!!
If it is of any help:
i live with a Dragonball Z, naruto, bleach and rockband fanatic.
We have figurines EVERYWHERE and for all over the place!!
At least you are making a profit off if this hobby. All I get is clutter and dustbunnies!
I really really love your website!
Wow.
An incredibly oxymoronic situation is my boyfriend and I are very different. He adores (I mean, obsessively) Dragonball and all its sequels while I enjoy Hello Kitty. I get him random things for that and he gets me random Hello Kitty things. I nearly stopped enjoying it when he gave me a Hello Kitty thong… but that’s too much info.
I absolutely love your blog and have been avidly reading it from 4-10pm almost every night for over two weeks. I love it. -laughs-
~ Be strong and hope that Sanrio will, maybe, stop making Hello Kitty accessories and make a Goodbye Kitty line.
Have a good day. ^_^
I’m sorry you have to live with Hello Kitty.
You made the big-time being mentioned on NPR!
Testify Brother!
I feel your pain! I recently loaned my fiancee my .380 Makarov (for reasons that are unimportant). In order to feel less intimidated by it (and with impeccable HK logic) she proceeded to “enhance” same with glow-in-the-dark Hello Kitty stickers, claiming that said stickers would enable her to more rapidly find the font of firepower in a low-light setting.
I have to buy a new one now…the other one just doesn’t feel right anymore, no amount of cleaning can remove the shame and stain…
where did you get hk microscope
How come your wife wants you to take her on a Hello Kitty shopping spree when she owns her own store?
To all the people who don’t believe that this is a real blog and all that, I say, who cares? It gets me laughing, keeps me, (a teenager) off the streets and gives me something to do. I think this blog is a brilliant idea and cheers me up on even the saddest days by your humorous jokes. Thank you so much.
TO DARLENE- If you love hello kitty so much why did you bother to research and comment on an obviously non-hello-kitty-loving site? You’re a hypocrite.
Once again I have sympathy for you in your hello kitty hell, and also the fact that you probably are writing this blog on a hello kitty PC…
I think my fiancee could relate to you.
He kind lives in a Hello Kitty hell.
Thanks for your website! As a HK admirer and collector, I love to read some of your blog to my husband from time to time, so he can realize that my collection is nowhere near to what you are living with, so he can feel lucky. He did nix the idea of having a HK kitchen though…
You’re a really strange guy !
Writting on Hello Kitty community forum, playing on HKO and telling “I hate this little cat”.
If I really hatred something, I would like to get rid of every thing that remind me this thing. So if my house was full of this hated-thing, you could be sure I won’t go on websites which could remind me this thing.
And stop to be so hard with Kitty fans. We’re not more idiot than you. If you’re putting adds for HK selling items, that’s for winning money on it. Hello Kitty fans perfectly know how to use Google ! But we don’t need Google XD Ebay is the best way to buy HK items. Google is useless.
I love your sense of humor. I wonder what other obsessions and collections people have that totally take on a life of their own. My husband’s family had a coca-cola bottling franchise for over 100 years and all of us collected. I didn’t think how weird we all were until we were on a company sponsored trip on a Mediterranean cruise, and while we were in Bethlehem observing the birthplace of Christ, an Israeli Coke truck passed by and the whole group took off running after it to get a picture beside it. After we sold the business, I can’t even imagine buying one more coke thing.
LOL @ “Why don’t you grow some balls and just divorce your wife?”
i must say that i think this person must be single, coz there is no way, and no couple in the whole world that have exactly the same interests, ur wife likes hello kitty, somewhere in the world theres someone complaining about his wife obcession with shoes or clothes, whatever its not a reason to say something like that im sure u love ur wife u just dont share same love for hello kitty, who cares??
Just wanted to say that i love ur blog and was nice to read that u donate and care for others, ppl should comment on that and maybe try to put a lil bit of effort in donating and thinking of the less fortunate instead of leaving hatefull comments just coz theyr too obcessed with hello kitty!
darlene’s a hypocryte, i even ended up giving her advices on how to cope with HKH supporters for the sake of hello kitty hell, lets just get darlene her attention by making a special post where only she can comment, nobody else, but darlene. HAAAAHAAAAHAAA!!!
“I don’t think as this would undoubtedly send me someplace where they have Hello Kitty straight jackets…”
I felt the same way as I knew someone insanely obsessed, and then I wound up rooming with “it” for a year.
Awesome blog!
Lol. My very first doll was a Hello Kitty. My mom thought loved it and as the years passed.. my room became more and more filled with Hello Kitty. I’ve never liked pink…the exact color my room is. I can’t wait till the day I’m old enough to move out!
andd– I really like this site…
You, sir, are a very funny man. Have you ever thought about using this as a base for a book? I would definitely buy it!!
lmaoo!! I like Hello Kitty, but Sanrio does overdo it a bit. I feel sorry for you, but this is hilarious. [=
i am one of those you referred to as hello kitty fanatics – obviously as you can see from my email add =). i just want to say your blog is hilarious, and you are too damn funny. and i guess you’re not even trying to be – which makes it even funnier as ‘hell’ . i know you created this blog to vent, and people just have to take a chill pill and not take this too seriously. and also, your wife is lucky to have found somebody who can put up with sleeping on the couch in a HK sleeping bag. LOL
awesome site! keep on blogging!
i hate you so much i love hllo kitty so haha
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this blog. My wife is a HK fanatic, and the worst part about it is that all our checks are pink HK. It’s embarrassing. Like when I have to write a check for $20 to the guy who runs my fantasy football league.
hi, i know this is rather redundant BUT, i love<3love<3 hellokitty. i love the way you present the stuff too, its hilarious.
much hellokitty love.
This blog is really funny. I had some knock-off HK paper dolls as a child before I was old enough to know what the brand was. Later I just thought it was silly and am indifferent, but I can see how living in a house full of HK stuff could drive you up the wall.
omg. this is the most hilarious blog i have ever read. As i do love the HK, your blog will bring alot of men alot of comfort. hehe Also at least use the Hello Kitty blanket (the plush one) when you are on the couch…xoxo Avaa
For some reason, this made me laugh really hard:
“Do you remember the thing your wife bought that finally set you off the deep end?
Hello Kitty pancake maker.”
I guess it was because there was no in depth reasoning. Just simply put. ha! Your blog rules.
Lolz!
You seem to be be discriminating Hello Kitty but at the same time, making everyone laugh. Keep up the good work!