Monthly Archives: March 2007

Hello Kitty Heels

I thought that my torture with Hello Kitty shoes was going to be limited to the Hello Kitty Converse High Tops and casual clothes, but of course I underestimated the lengths to which Hello Kitty would go to in order to increase my Hello Kitty Hell. Yesterday, I was informed that my wife had ordered Hello Kitty heels: While the shoes themselves scare me to no end, the thought of when and what outfit she will actually wear these with … Continue reading

Posted in Clothes | 49 Comments

Hello Kitty Sex Toy ??

Maybe it wasn’t obvious to me simply because I’m a man, but I had no idea what this Hello Kitty item was when I first saw it. Actually, something did come to mind and it scared the Hello Kitty Hell out of me, but fortunately I was way off base (kind of like the Hello Kitty condom that ended up being cheese) Yes, I realize now that it’s a far stretch to assume it was a sex toy, but I’m … Continue reading

Posted in Sex, Strange | 47 Comments

Hello Kitty Car Window Sprayer

It’s when your wife starts coming home with things like this that you know that Hello Kitty has infiltrated absolutely every product that exists (except beer and pizza which I’m sure is just a matter of time): This is a Hello Kitty car window spray cover device: Now not only do I have to look out the car window at Hello Kitty, I get to watch her spit a flowing stream of water at my face. Somehow that definitely seems … Continue reading

Posted in Vehicle | 24 Comments

Hello Kitty Karaoke Machine

My wife has managed to already wage an effective assault campaign on my senses: visual with all the Hello Kitty in our house, taste with her continuing theory that an all Hello Kitty food diet would be “cute” and and smell with the new Hello Kitty perfume, so why stop there? So, of course, my wife is eyeing the Hello Kitty portable karaoke machine and CD player to assault my hearing as well: Just imagine someone singing Hello Kitty karaoke … Continue reading

Posted in Gadgets | 10 Comments

Hello Kitty Perfume – Momoberry

Great. Just the news I needed to hear. It appears that Sanrio has decided that Hello Kitty needed a perfume and they just released one called Momoberry: Now not only will I have to see Hello Kitty all over the place, I will now have to smell (there is something very wrong with that) Hello Kitty everywhere from now on. Even though I tell myself time and again that Hello Kitty Hell can’t get any worse, it continues to do … Continue reading

Posted in Beauty | 19 Comments

Hello Kitty Planetarium

Sometimes (OK, all the time if I must be honest) I simply have to shake my head when I see some of the stuff that arrives at our house. The latest is the Hello Kitty planetarium: My biggest fear is that when we actually use it, Hello Kitty will somehow be part of the constellations. Makes me shiver just thinking about that, although it would be typical Hello Kitty Hellish…

Posted in Toys | 2 Comments

Hello Kitty Bubble Bath – It Kills You…

I always knew that Hello Kitty was evil, I just didn’t have the proof…until now. It appears that Hello Kitty Bubble Bath would like to give you cancer: The characters are irresistible to your child, but a new study reveals there’s a suspected human cancer-causing chemical inside millions of bottles of bubbles… The FDA recommends a maximum of 10 parts per million (ppm) of the contaminant. The author says of the products tested, 15% exceeded that recommendation. Among the children’s … Continue reading

Posted in Baby, Beauty | 33 Comments

Hello Kitty Diamond Ring – Neiman Marcus

There is something seriously wrong in the world when I have to write a blog post about Hello Kitty and diamond rings and feel the necessity to add where the diamond ring is coming from (Neiman Marcus) because it might be confused with other Hello Kitty diamond rings out there. That is just down right pathetic. So this is the newest ring that my wife has her eyes on: Of course, it costs over $4,000 (yep, not a typo there), … Continue reading

Posted in Jewelry | 32 Comments

Hello Kitty Stamps Used

One of the biggest problems with living in Hello Kitty Hell is that if Hello Kitty happens to be on something, then that something can’t be thrown out. That means that whenever I open a drawer, something Hello Kitty usually emerges. It’s not enough that all our stamps are Hello Kitty stamps, but it seems that my wife has been collecting all the used Hello Kitty stamps that have been sent to her (and believe me, every letter and package … Continue reading

Posted in Money | 9 Comments

Hello Kitty Snowboard

We went on our last day of skiing and snowboarding for the year. As you can imagine, it’s not difficult at all to spot my wife on the slopes with her Hello Kitty snowboard: Update: At these these Hello Kitty snowboard designs reflect how most of us would like to see the evil feline: Sent in by snowguy

Posted in Sports | 37 Comments

Hello Kitty Golf Balls 2

It seems that one Hello Kitty fanatic didn’t appreciate my idea of having the Hello Kitty golf balls “accidentally find their way into (water) hazards one after another after I smack them as hard as I can” and decided to email my wife before I took off on my golf outing. Basically, the anonymous emailer said I was going to “abuse” Hello Kitty (I could make a pretty good argument that it’s not possible to abuse a golf ball when … Continue reading

Posted in Sports | 8 Comments

Hello Kitty Golf Balls

So some friends invited me to go play golf this weekend and my wife tells me that she has a gift for me to take when I’m golfing. I knew as soon as I saw the wrapped package what was coming. There was no doubt in my mind that the golf balls would be Hello Kitty – I just didn’t realize they would be 4 patterns of Hello Kitty: When you’re out with your buddies golfing, pulling out a Hello … Continue reading

Posted in Sports | 19 Comments

Hello Kitty Porsche

Why does this not surprise me? I post about a Hello Kitty car and a few hours later I have a photo of a Hello Kitty Porsche in my email inbox. While not quite as overdone as the Hello Kitty Ferrari, this is obviously another photoshopped car. Of course, this has little effect on my wife. She likes it. Which puts me into the ultimate Hello Kitty man quandary. I have a wife that will happily let me purchase a … Continue reading

Posted in Vehicle | 22 Comments

Hello Kitty Car

You know there is something wrong when you start getting emails from people wondering when you are going to update Hello Kitty Hell. This wouldn’t be a bad thing if the people wanting the update were those that disliked Hello Kitty, but these are Hello Kitty fans. I will state right now that if you are getting withdrawal symptoms because you aren’t getting enough updates from a blog named Hello Kitty Hell, you’re way too into Hello Kitty. Do a … Continue reading

Posted in Vehicle | 41 Comments

Hello Kitty (Official) Pantie Liners

Ah, the joys of having people send random Hello Kitty photos my way. Now not only do I know that there are unofficial Hello Kitty pantie liners, I also know that Kotex makes official Hello Kitty pantie liners (at least in China). I can already hear the conversation that is coming once my wife stumbles across this….”We can fly over on the Hello Kitty airline, pick up all kinds of Hello Kitty goods that aren’t available in Japan (like there … Continue reading

Posted in Health, Strange | 17 Comments

Hello Kitty TV #3 & #4

I guess it really wouldn’t come as a surprise that two different Hello Kitty TV set models would be enough. I’ve already mentioned the apple model and the flat screen model in previous posts, but then reader Mackenzie had to go point out that there was another Hello Kitty TV model in the comments area. I knew that it was merely a matter of time before my wife wandered in there and found yet another TV to add to her … Continue reading

Posted in Appliances | 33 Comments

Hello Kitty Skeleton

After my last post, I wondered if anything might shed a little stream of light into Hello Kitty Hell, and frankly, I wasn’t optimistic. That was until I saw what Hello Kitty looks like underneath all that “cuteness” and I realized that, yep, that was about what I expected. My wife was less thrilled with the rendering that Michael Paulus created: These Icons are usually grotesquely distorted from the human form from which they derive. Being that they are so … Continue reading

Posted in Strange | 19 Comments