Hello Kitty Hell

Since it is the holiday season, Hello Kitty would never be satisfied with reintroducing a new Hello Kitty laptop look and adding a Hello Kitty mouse. She would demand more and of course, NEC would produce it in the form of a Hello Kitty Swarovski 1GB USB Memory Stick:

And because it is Hello Kitty, that [...]

Of course, NEC couldn’t simply stop with a new computer look. They had to create more bling to make Hello Kitty fanatics drool with dreamy lust as their significant others looked on in gut-wrenching pain. Thus the introduction of the Hello Kitty Swarovski crystal bead heart shaped mouse:

Of course, this Hello Kitty fanatic lust has [...]

Not only is one Hello Kitty laptop not enough for the evil feline, one Hello Kitty NEC Hello Kitty laptop with Swarovski crystal beads is not enough. Thus NEC has released a new version of their Lavie G model covered once again is crystallized bling:

Since my wife already has the previous model, why would she [...]

Halloween is not celebrated in Japan, but now my wife wants to dress up in a costume because of this photo sent in:

While my instincts are to go into yet another rant, maybe it will suffice to say that this is by far the scariest costume that anyone could come up with for Halloween. I [...]

Now that it is holiday shopping season (at least to Sanrio which officially launched the Christmas selling season a few days ago in Japan), my wife is drooling at all the new stuff being launched. Another of the many embarrassing things about living in Hello Kitty Hell is that gifts to friends and relatives often [...]

It really does not help my Hello Kitty Hell when people actually take suggestions of my wife such as learning how to carve a Hello Kitty o’ lantern:

via Movies of Myself (with the hope that it does mold and collapse into a zombie Kitty and we get to see a photo of that)

Sent in by [...]

I have come to the conclusion that one of the most important skill sets when you live in Hello Kitty Hell is to learn how to keep your mouth shut on things you need and buy them yourself. While I have become quite good at this over the years, every once in awhile I slip [...]

While all Hello Kitty products make me cringe, there are some that go beyond the normal Hello Kitty Hell cringe and bring actual physical pain to me when I think about them. My head is throbbing just thinking about the newest gadget my wife wants: the Hello Kitty Karaoke machine:

Listening to the Hello Kitty theme [...]

One of the things that I have noticed about Hello Kitty is that she takes Holiday specific items and tries to make them generic thus allowing the Hello Kitty fanatic to use the evil feline all year round instead of at only a specific time of the year. It is with this in mind that [...]

You know that Hello Kitty Hell has reached an entirely new level of Hellishness when someone like me is actually invited to a Hello Kitty convention to give a presentation:
I know you and Mrs. HKH are in Japan, but I wanted to let you know that next November, you’re invited to KittyCon 2008. It’s a [...]

In the never ending quest to be everywhere, Hello Kitty invades places that she should never be. How else can you explain the Hello Kitty World of Warcraft personalised interface:

For those unfamiliar, World of Warcraft (WoW) is an online game where people going around killing anything and everything. Obviously, there are players that believe that [...]

I am not sure why Hello Kitty fanatics feel compelled to send me the Hello Kitty tattoos that they have gotten. It would seem that I would be the last person they would want to send it to. It’s not like I am going to give them a large compliment on it, but then it [...]

This is the time of year when people begin to take out their winter items. If you live in Hello Kitty Hell, that means having to deal with another year of such items like the Hello Kitty USB lap warmer and Hello Kitty USB foot warmers, but unfortunately things don’t stop there. That is because [...]

One of the worst aspects of living in Hello Kitty Hell is that all holidays are completely ruined. It is impossible to enjoy any holiday because it gets Hello Kittified. And just to make sure that everyone not only buys Hello Kitty goods on that particular holiday, Sanrio provides directions on how you can Hello [...]

I guess if there are Hello Kitty guns and Hello Kitty Armoured Personnel Carriers, it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that something which is supposed to exude love and friendship would be found on a AK-47:

Again, my wife is totally anti-Hello Kitty gun — “Hello Kitty brings love, she doesn’t kill” — but I [...]

As has been noted on numerous occasions, Hello Kitty has no problem venturing into any area in the pursuit of the all mighty dollar. Hey, if a good fairy tale is out there, Hello Kitty is sure to try and Kittify it. That’s the only explanation that I can find for this Hello Kitty glass [...]

There are a lot of Hello Kitty items that are unfathomably useless such as this and this (Hello Kitty items come in three different categories: useless, completely useless or unfathomably useless). We can now add another one to the unfathomably useless category. Let me introduce you to the Hello Kitty golf ball holder:

Can anyone explain [...]

It appears that Sanrio has decided to really make my life Hell by introducing a Hello Kitty men’s fashion line that consists of T-shirts, boxers, bags, sports wear and watches.

I find all the Hello Kitty photos I receive disturbing, but then there are those that I find disturbing on multiple levels.
1. It was [...]

It’s bad enough that Sanrio is able to sell Hello Kitty bottled water, but why stop when you have a good thing going? Apparently if bottling water with the evil feline on the front for drinking sells well, then bottling water with Hello Kitty on the front to splash on your skin would be even [...]

You may remember me telling you about the pimped out Hello Kitty cell phone that my wife had made and my embarrassing experience in the grocery store with it a couple of months back. My wife was quite distressed to learn that I wasn’t kidding when I said I couldn’t find the Hello Kitty sausages [...]