Monthly Archives: October 2007

Hello Kitty Swarovski 1GB USB Memory Stick

Since it is the holiday season, Hello Kitty would never be satisfied with reintroducing a new Hello Kitty laptop look and adding a Hello Kitty mouse. She would demand more and of course, NEC would produce it in the form of a Hello Kitty Swarovski 1GB USB Memory Stick: And because it is Hello Kitty, that 1GB of memory costs $135 (15,750 yen). With the computer likely coming to me as a present, and the mouse as a stocking stuffer, … Continue reading

Posted in Computers | 21 Comments

Hello Kitty Swarovski Computer Mouse

Of course, NEC couldn’t simply stop with a new computer look. They had to create more bling to make Hello Kitty fanatics drool with dreamy lust as their significant others looked on in gut-wrenching pain. Thus the introduction of the Hello Kitty Swarovski crystal bead heart shaped mouse: Of course, this Hello Kitty fanatic lust has a price: $110 (12,600 yen) for a computer mouse. Should I be expecting this as a stocking stuffer to go along with the computer? … Continue reading

Posted in Computers | 15 Comments

Hello Kitty NEC Laptop Computer

Not only is one Hello Kitty laptop not enough for the evil feline, one Hello Kitty NEC Hello Kitty laptop with Swarovski crystal beads is not enough. Thus NEC has released a new version of their Lavie G model covered once again is crystallized bling: Since my wife already has the previous model, why would she need this one? (Yes, I know a very stupid question since we have already determined that Hello Kitty fanatics don’t need any reason when … Continue reading

Posted in Computers | 41 Comments

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume

Halloween is not celebrated in Japan, but now my wife wants to dress up in a costume because of this photo sent in: While my instincts are to go into yet another rant, maybe it will suffice to say that this is by far the scariest costume that anyone could come up with for Halloween. I have no doubt that little children screamed in terror as she walked down the street (because that is undoubtedly what I would have been … Continue reading

Posted in Fashion, Holiday, Strange | 30 Comments

Hello Kitty ATM Bank

Now that it is holiday shopping season (at least to Sanrio which officially launched the Christmas selling season a few days ago in Japan), my wife is drooling at all the new stuff being launched. Another of the many embarrassing things about living in Hello Kitty Hell is that gifts to friends and relatives often come with the evil pink feline on them. I no longer even try to explain — when they shoot me that look of “what the … Continue reading

Posted in Money, Toys | 44 Comments

Pumpkin Carving

It really does not help my Hello Kitty Hell when people actually take suggestions of my wife such as learning how to carve a Hello Kitty o’ lantern: via Movies of Myself (with the hope that it does mold and collapse into a zombie Kitty and we get to see a photo of that) Sent in by Marla (It seems to me that Kitty isn’t happy being associated with Hello Kitty) Sent in by someone who asked not to have … Continue reading

Posted in Holiday | 21 Comments

Hello Kitty Paper Shredder

I have come to the conclusion that one of the most important skill sets when you live in Hello Kitty Hell is to learn how to keep your mouth shut on things you need and buy them yourself. While I have become quite good at this over the years, every once in awhile I slip up with horrifying results. May I introduce you to the Hello Kitty paper shredder: It is almost always the office that gets me in trouble … Continue reading

Posted in Business | 35 Comments

Hello Kitty Karaoke Machine

While all Hello Kitty products make me cringe, there are some that go beyond the normal Hello Kitty Hell cringe and bring actual physical pain to me when I think about them. My head is throbbing just thinking about the newest gadget my wife wants: the Hello Kitty Karaoke machine: Listening to the Hello Kitty theme song is enough to make any normal human sick, but accompany that with Hello Kitty fanatics singing the song at the top of their … Continue reading

Posted in Gadgets, Music | 17 Comments

Hello Kitty Christmas Lights Candy Rocks

One of the things that I have noticed about Hello Kitty is that she takes Holiday specific items and tries to make them generic thus allowing the Hello Kitty fanatic to use the evil feline all year round instead of at only a specific time of the year. It is with this in mind that Sanrio has renamed their Hello Kitty Christmas lights as “Hello Kitty Candy Rocks” It’s bad enough that they are selling Christmas lights well before Halloween, … Continue reading

Posted in Decor, Holiday | 27 Comments

Hello Kitty Convention 2008

You know that Hello Kitty Hell has reached an entirely new level of Hellishness when someone like me is actually invited to a Hello Kitty convention to give a presentation: I know you and Mrs. HKH are in Japan, but I wanted to let you know that next November, you’re invited to KittyCon 2008. It’s a fan-sponsored and supported convention of Kitty lovers to meet, shop, swap, and learn more about everyone’s (!) favorite feline. I’ve just kicked off the … Continue reading

Posted in Hello Kitty | 37 Comments

Hello Kitty World of Warcraft

In the never ending quest to be everywhere, Hello Kitty invades places that she should never be. How else can you explain the Hello Kitty World of Warcraft personalised interface: For those unfamiliar, World of Warcraft (WoW) is an online game where people going around killing anything and everything. Obviously, there are players that believe that adopting a Hello Kitty theme will give them the added advantage they need to spread destruction and misery throughout the world. Hmmmm, on second … Continue reading

Posted in Computers, Games | 53 Comments

Hello Kitty Space Candy Tattoo

I am not sure why Hello Kitty fanatics feel compelled to send me the Hello Kitty tattoos that they have gotten. It would seem that I would be the last person they would want to send it to. It’s not like I am going to give them a large compliment on it, but then it has already been established that Hello Kitty fanatics don’t make a whole of of sense. Thus I have been sent yet another Hello Kitty tattoo: … Continue reading

Posted in Tattoo | 25 Comments

Hello Kitty Space Heater

This is the time of year when people begin to take out their winter items. If you live in Hello Kitty Hell, that means having to deal with another year of such items like the Hello Kitty USB lap warmer and Hello Kitty USB foot warmers, but unfortunately things don’t stop there. That is because the evil feline can’t begin a new season without placing her mark on a whole new line for Hello Kitty fanatics to drool over. Thus … Continue reading

Posted in Appliances, Gadgets | 31 Comments

Hello Kitty Halloween Pumpkin

One of the worst aspects of living in Hello Kitty Hell is that all holidays are completely ruined. It is impossible to enjoy any holiday because it gets Hello Kittified. And just to make sure that everyone not only buys Hello Kitty goods on that particular holiday, Sanrio provides directions on how you can Hello Kittify it yourself with such things as how to make a Hello Kitty pumpkin (note that a pumpkin with Hello Kitty on the front is … Continue reading

Posted in Holiday | 22 Comments

Hello Kitty AK-47

Note: Sanrio legal counsel has contacted me because they realize that their fans are not bright enough to know what is an official Sanrio product and what is not. They didn’t feel that this would be a problem until the fans started contacting them directly, and they soon realized how painful it was to actually have to converse with a fanatic, and not even they had the patience to actually do this. As a result, they sent out a notice … Continue reading

Posted in Guns, Strange | 82 Comments

Hello Kitty Glass Slipper

As has been noted on numerous occasions, Hello Kitty has no problem venturing into any area in the pursuit of the all mighty dollar. Hey, if a good fairy tale is out there, Hello Kitty is sure to try and Kittify it. That’s the only explanation that I can find for this Hello Kitty glass slipper: I’m not sure why this particular product annoys me so much. Yes, it’s useless, but as has already been established, so are all items … Continue reading

Posted in Decor, Wedding | 45 Comments

Hello Kitty Golf Ball Holder

There are a lot of Hello Kitty items that are unfathomably useless such as this and this (Hello Kitty items come in three different categories: useless, completely useless or unfathomably useless). We can now add another one to the unfathomably useless category. Let me introduce you to the Hello Kitty golf ball holder: Can anyone explain to me why anyone would need a golf ball holder, let alone a Hello Kitty golf ball holder? Let’s think about this logically for … Continue reading

Posted in Sports | 24 Comments

Hello Kitty Men’s Fashion

It appears that Sanrio has decided to really make my life Hell by introducing a Hello Kitty men’s fashion line that consists of T-shirts, boxers, bags, sports wear and watches. I find all the Hello Kitty photos I receive disturbing, but then there are those that I find disturbing on multiple levels. 1. It was emailed to me by someone who has their blog hosted by Sanrio. I realize (although I still have a difficult time understanding why – must … Continue reading

Posted in Clothes, Fashion | 46 Comments

Hello Kitty Skin Water

It’s bad enough that Sanrio is able to sell Hello Kitty bottled water, but why stop when you have a good thing going? Apparently if bottling water with the evil feline on the front for drinking sells well, then bottling water with Hello Kitty on the front to splash on your skin would be even more successful. Thus, the invention of Hello Kitty skin water: As a guy, if this was just plain old skin water I would be asking … Continue reading

Posted in Beauty | 34 Comments

Hello Kitty Sausages

You may remember me telling you about the pimped out Hello Kitty cell phone that my wife had made and my embarrassing experience in the grocery store with it a couple of months back. My wife was quite distressed to learn that I wasn’t kidding when I said I couldn’t find the Hello Kitty sausages because our local store stopped selling them (yes, there is one sane store manager who was able to stand up to Sanrio in Japan). That … Continue reading

Posted in Food | 48 Comments