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Feel free to contact me at hellokittyhell @ kittyhell.com unless you are going to ask where you can find some Hello Kitty item on this site -- in that case, don't bother because it ain't going to happen.

And if you are even thinking about whining about it, read my special message to Hello Kitty whiners.

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Hello Kitty For Men

Stop! Take your hand off the mouse and don’t even think of clicking the “send” on the email to let me know about Hello Kitty for Men - yes, I’m fully aware that they exist and (unfortunately), I have for a few months now:

Hello Kitty for men

While the entire concept of Hello Kitty for men is disturbing, the emails themselves have been just as disturbing. First and foremost, there is something seriously wrong when I log into my email account and have 62 emails informing me about this news. This not to mention the people who have left the link in various threads on the blog.

Think about this for a minute — 62 readers read about something Hello Kitty and for some inexplicable reason thought it would be a good idea to send me an email about it. That in itself shows the Hello Kitty Hell I live in…

I have grown to expect emails from clueless Hello Kitty fanatics that somehow think that, despite the name of my blog and what I write about the evil feline, that I get excited about stuff like this. They have distorted their world view so much that they believe that I would feel the Hello Kitty for Men concept is a good thing:

“Have you heard?? Sanrio is going to be debuting a line of HK products for men! Isn’t that awesome!?”

“Hello Kitty was made for men. I’m buying these for all the guys I know. Your wife will be too!”

While it’s disturbing that anyone would view this as a good thing, these are typical emails that one expects when living in Hello Kitty Hell. What was surprising this time around was the glee that seemed to accompany many of the emails of what this would mean for me. While many began with sympathy for my Hello Kitty Hell, they eventually showed their true colors of being enthusiastic about the further pain and suffering this was bound to cause.

“Dude, guess your life sucks more. Can’t wait to see photos.”

“I know you hate Hello Kitty, but your wife is going to love these and torture you more with them.”

“These are the ugliest things ever, but get used to it because it’s going to be your new wardrobe.”

“Welcome to your doom.”

I’m not sure if it is a good psychological sign that in addition to the Hello Kitty fanatics who seem unfathomably compelled to read this blog, there are also a good number of readers who get a sense of satisfaction and happiness from my Hello Kitty Hell. Or as one reader aptly wrote about Hello Kitty for men:

“Sure, my life sucks. But not as much as yours.”

Yep, that pretty much sums up Hello Kitty Hell…

PS - in the time it took me to write this post, 3 more emails informing me about this news arrived in my account…

Comments

Comment from Carol
Time: December 29, 2007, 8:21 pm

Your misery is our entertainment :D

Comment from Marla
Time: December 29, 2007, 8:30 pm

Yeah, I saw that on cute overload. I think it is pretty evil, but maybe you could post pictures of yourself modeling it. Then we could really laugh at your expense! ;)

Actually, I hope you don’t have to wear it ever, but I’m sure you will.

Comment from darlene
Time: December 29, 2007, 9:28 pm

What exactly is your problem? Why do you go out of your way to say mean things about the people that make this blog popular? It’s unbelievable.

Here are some hints for you that you don’t seem to be able to get through your thick brain.

One. The only reason this blog is popular is because people send you all these photos. Without them, this blog would be so boring. You should be thanking all the people that sent you this information, not calling then disturbing. Without them, you’d be nothing.

Two. Hello Kitty fans are your biggest readers. It’s not because of what you write, but because of the photos. So if people stop sending you good photos, then you will lose all the people that make your blog popular.

Three. You are so biased that nobody can take you seriously. You have no appreciation of the truth and this turns people off. You should write the truth about Hello Kitty, not your lame opinion.

Four. Your negative and nobody like negative people. That is why they love Hello Kitty. She is the opposite of you and why she is so much more popular than you are.

Five. You are riding on Hello Kitty’s coattails. Without Hello Kitty, you would not be popular because your blog wouldn’t exist. So everything you have is owed to Hello Kitty.

Maybe if you take a second to look at the truth, you’ll see that you have to change your ways and be nice to your readers and to Hello Kitty.

Comment from blinkyazn
Time: December 29, 2007, 9:33 pm

I don’t understand. Will darlene ever get bored of writing the same things over and over again? And how come, if she doesn’t like the blog, she is always one of the first 10 people posting comments?

About those clothes… They are frightful and I hope you won’t have to wear those, although your wife most probably will get you a full wardrobe of HK. If I were you, I’d burn them!

Comment from gretchen
Time: December 29, 2007, 10:21 pm

I admit it. I do enjoy your pain. Not actually your pain, but the way that you describe it in this blog. It makes me laugh and shake my head and for some reason brighten my spirit. I’m not sure why, but I feel it and at the same time I have to laugh.

Comment from Suzanne
Time: December 29, 2007, 11:16 pm

You know, HKH guy, you do this to yourself. I know if I was horrified by something, I wouldn’t make a blog about it. Because people would send me pictures. Why would I torture myself further? If you truly hate receiving submissions, I say, shut the blog down altogether. We only send things to you because we are trying to better your blog.

Comment from Carol
Time: December 29, 2007, 11:24 pm

I suspect HKH is secretly very happy. I bet HKH likes seeing his writing lauded by so many even as he writes about the source of his deepest pain. The agony! With the ecstasy!

Comment from steph
Time: December 29, 2007, 11:29 pm

HKH, were your xmas presents hello kitty free this year?

Comment from Hello Kitty Hell
Time: December 29, 2007, 11:54 pm

HKH, were your xmas presents hello kitty free this year?

lol - that was a good one. No occasion is ever Hello Kitty free when you live in Hello Kitty Hell…

Comment from liz
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:20 am

one, the reason i read this blog a lot is because it’s super funny.

two, i’m a fan of this blog, not a fan of hello kitty.

three, if you want a blog that’s hello kitty friendly, write it yourself. do not come here.

four, it’s called hellokittyhell.com what do you expect from people here?

five, nobody owes hello kitty anything. except for the hello kitty plush toy you didn’t pay for in sanrio store.

just shut up darlene…. although i do enjoy laughing at you.

Comment from liz
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:26 am

p.s there is a reason why they had to cut hello kitty’s face off for men’s clothes. it’d be better if they cut the whole head off though. what’s the point leaving the ribbon there?

Comment from Jesse
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:39 am

Ha, I love this blog. First time I’ve posted I think…anyways, sucks to be you, and like most people here I DO enjoy your pain, but it’s all about the way you present it that captivates so many people. Kudos on being able to turn the evil feline into something positive; the readers enjoyment.

Comment from sdjfdggn
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:39 am

i got a bit bored…. and things like this go threw my head every time i read darlene

“What exactly is your problem? Why do you go out of your way to say mean things about the blog, even though you think your the reason its popular? It’s unbelievable.

Here are some hints for you that you don’t seem to be able to get through your little pink brain.

One. The only reason this blog is popular is because people send you all these photos. Without them, this blog would be so boring. You should call the people who sent these too you disgusting. Without them, the blog will be nothing (and we would be happy).

Two. Hello Kitty fans are your biggest readers. It’s not because of what you write, but because of the photos. So it might help to stop posting these photos, and you will lose all the people that make your blog popular.

Three. You are so biased that nobody can take you seriously. You have no appreciation of the truth and this turns people off. You should write the truth about Hello Kitty, not your lame opinion. (Just think of this as spoken not be Darlene.)

Four. Your negative and we like negative people. That is why they love Hello Kitty hell. She is the opposite of you and why she is so much more popular than you are (thus making HELL.)

Five. You are riding on Hello Kitty’s coattails. Without Hello Kitty, you would be writing Winnie the Pooh Hell. So everything you have is owed to Hello Kitty.

Maybe if you take a second to look at the truth, you’ll see that you have to change your ways and be meaner to Hello Kitty and send that bitch to hell.”

Comment from Alenderis
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:57 am

I’ve noticed something. Darlene only comments on the posts that insult pro-hello kitty items. She didn’t comment on my Goodbye Kitty, so I think she tends to ignore anything anti-hello kitty cause it works towards breaking her fragile grip on what people think of Hello Kitty in her world. I think more people should send him anti-hello kitty images, both to make his world less hellish, and so I can test my theory.

Also, I have figured out the solution to getting rid of Hello Kitty for Men shirts. First you take all shirts you are given, you then add gasoline. Take your fire starting implement of choice and set them ablaze…..I would suggest not making smores or hot dogs with the fire, it may be poisonous.

Comment from k
Time: December 30, 2007, 1:38 am

The only reason I’d get this for my boyfriend would be as a joke. It wouldn’t be funny to him but I think it’d be hilarious just to see his expression when he saw it. But I’d definately NEVER make him wear it.

Comment from Alfred
Time: December 30, 2007, 6:52 am

I’ll buy it ALL!(:

Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: December 30, 2007, 9:48 am

If you click on my name you’ll find a link to a photo of the new sexy Hello Kitty! HK seems to have lost her innocence when we weren’t looking, and headed into Betty Boop land. This from a BBC article:

“To boost sales, Sanrio has also recently launched a slightly raunchy range where Hello Kitty cheekily displays her knickers.”

HK is flashing her undies. Note the word raunchy.

It will be fun to see how Darlene explains why it’s time for HK to be - well, bad!

Comment from Marie
Time: December 30, 2007, 1:00 pm

I may be a Hello Kitty fan, but I know where the line is drawn.

In other words, I would not get this for my husband (who hates HK as much as you, HKH Dude) and subject him to that kind of torture (It’s cruel and unusual.).

Comment from Flying Potato
Time: December 30, 2007, 2:39 pm

Sanrio said HK had a more “rugged” look on these designs…

Yeah, because wearing Hello Kitty is SO manly.

Comment from Just call me Liz
Time: December 30, 2007, 10:03 pm

Too be honest, I was gonna warn you to duck. I mean seriously, I like HK as much as the next person (unless the next person is either you or your wife), but this crosses the line, laughs at its pathetic inferiority, spits on it, and then leaves it in the dust. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE INNOCENT CUTENESS!! IT’S GONE! GOOONNNNNEEEEE!!!

Pingback from Hello Kitty Coffin Tattoo - Hello Kitty Hell
Time: December 31, 2007, 2:01 am

[…] brings us to what makes living in Hello Kitty so bad. Anyone that looked at Hello Kitty clothes for men would know instantly that these were wrong, but when you start comparing them to being forced to […]

Comment from Richard B
Time: December 31, 2007, 2:47 am

Holy shit man, if these people are being that cruel to you, you should just get a new email and ditch the one your using, and take it off the site so no one can email you with this horrible crap.

Rant:
MESSAGE TO ALL WHO SEND THIS GUY CRAP: You obviously think that just because your on the internet, making peoples lives a living hell is no big deal, because you think that “OH THEYRE NOT REAL PEOPLE! THEY DONT HAVE A SOUL! I CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT TO THEM!” well guess what, HES REAL! HE HAS A LIFE! HE HAS FEELINGS! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THIS HORRIBLE CRAP TO HIM! DO YOU KNOW WHAT DAMAGE YOU ARE DOING TO THIS MAN? THIS ISN’T SOME INNOCENT LITTLE GAME! YOU ARE RUINING HIS LIFE, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. no matter what you think, YOU ARE NOT ANONYMOUS ON THE INTERNET! How you ask? Well look up the term IP address. With your computers IP address, you can easily be tracked down. Think over that.
end of rant.

I come to your blog because occasionally, some of the crap you show is so utterly rediculous that its funny, not as in ” o-ho-ho, thats got to suck for him!”, but in a “why the hell did they make something so stupid!?”

I’m sorry that you get treated like this.

Comment from Suzanne
Time: December 31, 2007, 4:34 am

Richard B, do you not think that he’s asking for it by having this blog? His life would be SLIGHTLY less kittified (he’d still have his wife to deal with) if he didn’t have this blog. No e-mails from the readers showing him the worst of the worst products out there. I personally am horrified by certain types of porn out there (will not name them) but if I had a blog dedicated to ranting about it where people sent in SUBMISSIONS of this kind of porn to peeve me off… um, counter-productive much? If it really bothers him, he would shut down this site and get on with life as normally as he could. I personally think he’s a closet HK lover and loves to get personal updates sent to his e-mail.

Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: December 31, 2007, 8:01 am

This is the best satirical site on the net. This could be a newspaper series, a staple on a late night chat show, but I’m fortunate I found it on the net.

I personally like the style this blog is written in. I am not so literal with it.

Except when Darlene posts!

Comment from sanriobaby
Time: December 31, 2007, 10:27 am

Ok, I may be old fashioned, but honestly, HK is for girls (or the “little girl” in us women), not boys, and most certainly not men! This stuff my fly in Japan where HK is a real way of life, but in the rest of the world… just not gonna happen. I don’t know any hetro male in the U.S. that would wear a HK shirt in public, or in private for that matter! Any male forced to wear HK clothing should be looked upon with sympathy.

And to answer some of the comments above, yes, HK fans LOVE THIS SITE!!! For us, its all about the photos! It makes us super happy for the most part, and allows us to see and hunt down new things to add to our collection. It also allows us to covet the things we can’t find too! Is this a little sick, probably, but we don’t care. Collectors of HK are real true fans and as long as there are pictures to see the new, the unusual, useless, and even crazy products that Sanrio puts out there, HK fans will always love this site. This would include crazy darlene, who’s answers alone almost make this site so worth visiting. That is one fan who truely makes most men think there is a real HKH!

Comment from Muse
Time: December 31, 2007, 12:59 pm

hahaha. granted, there are some people that consider HK as a lifestyle, but most of them are not “grown up” japanese people. ALL of japan is not the manga and pocky crazed maniacs that the rest of the world seems to categorize them as. Just like here, there are different types of people. some like HK some hate hk some don’t even know or care what it is. Same rules apply there. pity ANY male forced to wear HK anything.
I repect someone’s right to like HK, but it’s ridiculous for a HK Lover to criticize someone for NOT liking HK. (or vice versa)

You don’t like the fact that someone doesnt like Hello Kitty?
Don’t read their blog.

Comment from k
Time: January 1, 2008, 1:09 am

You counted how many readers sent you an email about the same thing. Seriously!

Comment from Jenny
Time: January 1, 2008, 12:44 pm

Oh that’s awesome. I wonder if I can get my hubby to wear those.

Comment from Ron
Time: January 2, 2008, 2:27 am

But if it’s for men, shouldn’t it be hello…pussy?

Just asking!

Comment from ying
Time: January 3, 2008, 11:31 pm

Hahaha I think I saw that before

Comment from siimuk
Time: January 4, 2008, 8:48 pm

It aint going to happen in Australia!

Comment from Jessbyte
Time: January 8, 2008, 5:30 am

lol, my brother is going to paintball for his birthday and my boyfriend has been requisitioned to find him a pink t-shirt to wear to there (so that he stands out ^_^). But, alas, my brother has some sense and hates HK (smart, ne?), so what would be better for him than a pink HK shirt which he can wear to paintball :) The thought of people attacking HK with paintballs brings a smile to my face.

Comment from HKitty
Time: February 27, 2008, 9:29 pm

Yeah right Hello Kitty does not make clothes for men. I have been on the official Sanrio website and there is no such thing as this! And if it does exist Sanrio had nothing to do with it.

Comment from Mari
Time: March 24, 2008, 6:17 pm

Even if they are boy clothes. I’ll wear them =)

Comment from CryingMisery
Time: March 26, 2008, 7:44 am

Look, THAT is cool! xD

Men with Hello Kitty.. Nice! :P

I’d like to see :o

Comment from RSKS
Time: March 28, 2008, 9:50 am

somewhere out there i think hello kitty has a cult…..and they all wear her jumpsuits…..i think darlene may be the head of it….

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