Hello Kitty Electronic Toilet Paper Dispenser
Once again, Sanrio and Hello Kitty provide another items that instantly becomes a front-runner for the most useless product in the world. Of course, this makes no difference to my wife that has her heart set on one of these Hello Kitty electronic toilet paper dispensers for Christmas:
In classic Hello Kitty sales pitch style, the advertising copy trumps the low cost of using this device which only uses $1 a year in power to operate. Of course, that savings has little meaning when the unit itself costs approximately $220 (24,000 yen) which Hello Kitty seems to have conveniently forgotten while explaining how energy efficient the gadget is. And what do you get for that $220? The Hello Kitty toilet paper dispenser can be pre-program so that your exact favorite length of toilet paper will appear when pressing the button. That’s right. You can choose one of nine different length settings (each 20 centimeters difference) so that you never have more or less toilet paper than you really want for $220 and $1 a year in energy costs (if the thing doesn’t break after the first few uses).
While it really couldn’t make our bathroom look any worse than it already does and we have the Hello Kitty toilet paper that would match it perfectly, there is always the inconvenient problem that I’m not actually allowed to use the Hello Kitty toilet paper for its intended purpose which pretty much makes the entire gadget useless which pretty much sums up all gadgets in Hello Kitty Hell…
Posted: November 25th, 2007 under Hello Kitty Gadgets, Hello Kitty Strange.
Comments: 45
Comments
Comment from thisdaydreamer
Time: November 25, 2007, 3:17 am
How can it possibly be energy efficient when it takes up energy for something that 99.99999% of the population would never even consider using electricity for?
And how many people pay that much attention to how much toilet paper they use?
Even worse, it is a pink Hello Kitty toilet paper dispenser.
I think my head just exploded.
Comment from Misawa
Time: November 25, 2007, 7:00 am
cute but impratical xD
Also I lloooove your bathroom xD
If you want <3 You can unload some of your stuff to me <3 And to explain why your getting rid of stuff to your wife, say its donation xD HAHA (That would be funny to see.)
Good luck living in HKH.
Comment from darlene
Time: November 25, 2007, 7:30 am
Your wife asks for a simple gift and you don’t even have the decency to want to give it to her to make her happy. It goes a lot to show your true character. Your so selfish that all you think about is you and have no feelings for others. So what if you can’t use Hello Kitty toilet paper. You can use normal toilet paper and it will be convenient because it will come out exactly the length you want it. You should stop complaining and enjoy the convenience. And if you are so stubborn that you don’t want to use it, there is an area for another roll so you can use it by hand. So there is nothing that you should be complaining about. Just buy you wife what she wants. That’s your duty as a husband.
Comment from Autumn
Time: November 25, 2007, 7:49 am
this has to be the most outrageous gadget I have ever seen. other than the “taco dispenser” on a tv show last night. still this one might beat it.
Comment from Flying Potato
Time: November 25, 2007, 8:13 am
darlene wrote :
“Just buy you wife what she wants. That’s your duty as a husband.”
And I thought darlene couldn’t get more freaky!
If a woman wants to have every single stupid stuff she sees, either she stays with her parents, or she works. Come on, his “duty as a husband”? That’s one of the worst things I’ve ever read!
Anyway, I’ve been reading your blog for a while, and I really enjoy it, even though it scares me. I would have NEVER thought people could get so hysterical over something like Hello Kitty… Damn, they’re even worse than Star Trek fanatics! I’m glad I live in France, Hello Kitty hasn’t invaded the whole country… Yet.
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 25, 2007, 10:14 am
Measured toilet paper? Oh lord. Sanrio strikes again!
Comment from Heather
Time: November 25, 2007, 11:23 am
darlene strikes again, seriously, WHO measures how much toliet paper they use? I just quickly yanks out a long ribbon of paper, roll it into a ball, and do my rightful duty.
I’m surprised the thing doesn’t sing the Hello Kitty theme song or talks when you use it…………
Comment from Richard B
Time: November 25, 2007, 12:11 pm
@ darlene: When did he ever say he “wasn’t” going to get it for her? And since when Is that a duty for a husband? You must be pretty damn greedy if “husbands should get their wives whatever they want” makes up part of your logic.
As for this gadget… I actually laughed… because this has got to be one of the stupidest ideas for a gadget EVER.
Comment from Jackie
Time: November 25, 2007, 12:41 pm
“Just buy you wife what she wants. That’s your duty as a husband.”
so let me get this straight, say HKH man only had $12.00, and they were living in an alley between an HK store and a food store, and HKH man was really hungry, but HKH’s wife wants that really adorable “Hello Kitty Golf Ball Holder”, he should get it for her and starve because it’s his “duty”?
yeah, real smart logic darlene.
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 25, 2007, 2:09 pm
$220 for a toilet paper dispenser.
I still can’t get over that!
Comment from steph
Time: November 25, 2007, 3:58 pm
hahaha! darlene! you are back!
Comment from k
Time: November 25, 2007, 5:01 pm
Darlene – it’s hkh wife’s duty to make hkh man happy and shelfishly having the house done in something he absolutely detests is not what a loving unselfish wife would do. Try putting the shoe on the other foot. What if your house was done in something you hated, like I don’t know zombies and your husband demanded that you get him every power tool and house hold object with that print. Would it be your wifely duty to buy every single thing to please him?
I think hkh man’s wife should be more appreciative of him lovingly putting up with her selfishness and trying to make her happy despite what she does to make him unhappy and not caring, or thinking, that this is what she is realy doing. His actions show that he truely loves his wife and wants her to be happy.
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 25, 2007, 5:05 pm
I just added this page to my blog.
The Bears are losing, but it still seems wrong for me to be here during the game.
Comment from Eize
Time: November 25, 2007, 6:15 pm
Words fail me on this. And after reading darlene’s comment, I’ve got nothing else to say…
except: darlene, do you KNOW how to read?!?!
Comment from X
Time: November 25, 2007, 8:09 pm
I think Darlene is a fake. She knows she not doing any good- and just trying to piss you guys off. I’ve know a few people who aren’t happy if they haven’t made you mad.
You can tell that by her argument being so weak (and stupid) – and you guys going all up in the air about it.
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 25, 2007, 8:21 pm
Eize I love the Hello Kitty flipping the bird picture on your site and have linked to it thru my name.
Nice website by the way.
Comment from m
Time: November 25, 2007, 8:43 pm
Ridiculous! O.O
Comment from bear_1
Time: November 25, 2007, 10:16 pm
I think this qualifies as the most useless object EVER.
Comment from Eize
Time: November 25, 2007, 10:28 pm
Thanks, DJ. 
X made a good point; darlene is someone’s idea of pulling our collective leg.
Comment from k
Time: November 26, 2007, 1:15 am
Where could I get a hello kitty nipple ring? I haven’t been able to find one. The one hk item I want and I can’t find it!
Comment from Kitteh!!
Time: November 26, 2007, 2:43 am
Solution in search of non-existant problem.
Comment from Flying Potato
Time: November 26, 2007, 5:07 am
X wrote :
“I think Darlene is a fake. She knows she not doing any good- and just trying to piss you guys off. I’ve know a few people who aren’t happy if they haven’t made you mad.
You can tell that by her argument being so weak (and stupid) – and you guys going all up in the air about it.”
She might be fake, but anyway, don’t you think she symbolizes perfectly HK fanatics? She always manages to put all the worst things in HK fanatics in only one comment. She’s like… An entity of fanaticism.
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 26, 2007, 6:07 am
Darlene fake?
If she is, she’s a phony I can believe in!
Marketing creates a cult like atmosphere today. From the clapping and chanting at Trader Joe’s, to the “naturalness” of Whole Foods, to the “family of Saturn owners”. Nirvana is attained by shopping.
That so many people that are against “big corporations” fall for this shows it works.
In the old days people bought cars because of the mechanical and tech info- now they buy cars because they feel good.
And I believe Sanrio was the first company to understand this, and to craft a product line that would allow its consumers to buy from them, from the cradle to the grave.
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Time: November 26, 2007, 8:46 am
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Comment from TeratoMarty
Time: November 26, 2007, 10:17 am
I don’t like living human beings telling me how much paper I may use; the thought of taking such directives from an animatronic version of an imaginary cat is absolutely galling.
Comment from Linda
Time: November 26, 2007, 5:18 pm
Eh… “trumps” doesn’t mean “trumpets”. It’s a whole different word.
Comment from Hello Kittyaholic
Time: November 26, 2007, 5:37 pm
I wonder if darlene is HKHell’s wife and they both are sittin around dieing laughin at all the comments on her comment. LOL
Comment from DJ Psychomike
Time: November 26, 2007, 6:07 pm
If it is, they should have a tv show!
Comment from Wendyscat
Time: November 26, 2007, 6:41 pm
What I want to know is… ifyou end up with one (as surely you will), WHAT toilet paper will go in it? Surely it HAS to match! 
Also, did Sanrio do studies on how much ‘waste’ toliet paper there is by too many sheets being pulled off (oops, that came out a bit odd) and see this as environmentally friendly?
Still, along with the lollipop condoms and the initmate massagers this acknowledgement of basic human functions is almost ‘cool’. Now for HK sick-bags and poop-a-scoops >;->
Comment from k
Time: November 26, 2007, 7:35 pm
Maby darlene is the sanrio co trying, and failing, to brainwash us. Lol.
Comment from siimuk
Time: November 26, 2007, 11:53 pm
Why would you want something to count how many sheets of toilet paper to use?
Wouldn’t you prefer to pull according to the type of business you do??
Comment from Absinth
Time: November 27, 2007, 3:25 am
I’m just out of words… a toilet paper dispenser is very weird but darlene’s comment makes it just plane ilogical…
Comment from Wendy
Time: November 27, 2007, 9:25 am
Who the hell needs an electronic toilet paper dispenser?! Hello Kitty or not – that’s just plain ridiculous.
But the Kitty on the side is cute . . . .
Comment from k
Time: November 27, 2007, 11:38 am
I guess it would make sense if you are potty training, that way you don’t end up with the whole role in the toilet, cuz they’d only get so much tp out. I don’t seriously think a little boy would use this but ya never know.
Comment from Moriyah
Time: November 27, 2007, 8:28 pm
Is it sad that I think Darlene is a friggin crack pot? That woman really lives in her own little world.
My Dad sent me this link. It’s scares me. What if it came to life and started eating my leg as I was peeing? Evil electronic devices imbued with hate from too much pink? Scaaary…
Comment from Jessbyte
Time: November 29, 2007, 3:51 am
That’s not convenient at all. And it’s wastefull. What if you want 10cm or 30cm or 35cm of toilet paper, instead of the “20 centimetre intervals”? Do you have to get extra and then pull off the bit you don’t want and throw it in the bin? 
Comment from Sheesh!
Time: November 29, 2007, 5:04 am
Darlene.stop what you are doing and book a holiday right now! If this kind of thing stresses you out, you have issues…(should we start a club folks?)
Comment from Mary
Time: December 2, 2007, 10:14 am
So cute and funny article. I love Hello Kitty but I am too cheap to pay that much for a toliet paper dispenser! That would buy a lot of toliet paper! I saw a Hello Kitty sucker last night! It was too cute to eat! I applaud Sanrio for coming up with Hello Kitty. Smart marketing! I think people like it because most people like cute kittens and this kitten is perfect. You don’t have to feed it, take it to the vet, have it neutered, scoop it’s litter box or vacume up it’s hair and it never grows up or throws up on your new carpet! But being the cheap (I prefer frugal) person that I am, I will stick with the ones I get with my McDonald’s meals. Yeah, I get the kid’s meal. What else do you expect from a cheap, er, frugal person?
Comment from Hannah
Time: December 6, 2007, 1:06 pm
“Just buy you wife what she wants. That’s your duty as a husband.”
Actually Darlene, I’m the woman in my relationship and I spoil the hell outta my fiancee. He gets just about everything he wants.
Oh that turned your little world upside down didn’t it ROFL
Yeah they talked about installing these at work (not the HKH variety) WTF? I think they’re ridiculous.
Comment from leti
Time: March 30, 2008, 7:13 pm
where in the hell can i get one at
Comment from jen
Time: April 22, 2008, 6:21 pm
lol,you should take pics of your whole house of hello kitty!!!lol wow!!!!!!!!i need one lol[not realy]where does your wife buy her things??please emil me lol
Comment from Cody
Time: May 15, 2008, 6:00 am
Darlene pardon me, but all you are doing is ruining a decent blog that everyone seems to enjoy, i don’t think anyone is getting bored with it, if you want the truth about something find it out yourself.
Comment from Sakura
Time: May 19, 2008, 5:55 pm
OMG! I am a big fan of Hello Kitty! But never in my 19 years of living would i think to buy a Hello Kitty toliet paper dispenser! At least not for $220! Unless…I found it cheaper on Ebay! LOL But seriously! That’s crazy! How do you pay for all of this stuff! I know from personal expericence that Hello Kitty stuff is expensive! And you have a whole bathroom full of it! I would kinda have to agree that it is a little overboard. I wouldn’t say hell…. but overboard.
Comment from brit
Time: June 17, 2008, 4:15 pm
if it was a few hundred dollars lower id but it in a heart beat not joke :I
Comment from katie!
Time: September 18, 2008, 5:04 pm
i love hellokitty! why wouldnt you?!?! its AMAZING!:D
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