Hello Kitty Hell

It’s bad enough when your girlfriend encourages you to dress up in Hello Kitty stuff (same guy as in the photos below) and humiliate yourself, but you know you’ve reached new depths of horror when you begin to see Hello Kitty even when the evil feline is not there. Case in point – the Hello [...]

Sometimes when I see new Hello Kitty products, I think that Sanrio must actually be running out of things to Hello Kittify since there is no other explanation as to why some of these things are made. That, and the overwhelming focus that it’s never too early to indoctrinate the child masses into the Sanrio [...]

Mornings are never a good time of the day in Hello Kitty Hell since I never know what Hello Kitty themed food might show up in front of me. To combat this, I usually get a cup of coffee and sip it while reading the newspaper to prepare myself for what Hello Kitty food may [...]

I know there is no longer any doubt that Hello Kitty is determined to Hello Kittify every object possible, so it really shouldn’t come as a surprise to find a Hello Kitty welder’s helmet:

Maybe I’ll soon get my own love column because of my outstanding, well contemplated and accurate love advice to this email that was recently sent to me:
Ohayo!
Could use your input and suggestions here. I’m living in Japan, and I recently started dating a beautiful young lady. Good times, fun conversation, and blah blah [...]

It’s bad enough when Hello Kitty fanatics decide to dress up as Hello Kitty (here is far more proof than anyone in their right mind would ever want to see if you need any), but by far the worst part is when the Hello Kitty fanatic decides that the significant other must also participate (see [...]

It’s a sad, sad day in the world when the today’s youth believe it’s cool to tag walls with Hello Kitty graffiti:

One of the activities I undertake each year is collect toys for a local orphanage in Japan. While the orphanages here are pretty well run compared to other places in the world, there isn’t a whole lot of extra money for toys for the kids. So every year I go around and collect small toys [...]

You knew that it would eventually happen. If a Hello Kitty motorcycle exists, it was only a matter of time for the Hello Kitty motorcycle racing leathers to appear:

Just when I have about given up hope in Hello Kitty Hell, a photo arrives in my email box that brings a smile to my face. Let’s here a big round of applause for the Hello Kitty pincushion:

It’s really not like we need any more proof that there is something extremely wrong in the world. Just going through a few pages of this blog will make that abundantly clear. But for those who may have reserved a tiny space in their mind with doubt, I assume this will thoroughly erase it – [...]

It is quite disturbing when I find out that things on this blog are the inspiration for creating even more Hello Kitty crap. Take, for example, this Hello Kitty zombie cake:

It is amazing that week after week, when I somehow imagine that the worst of Hello Kitty has already found its way into our house and that things can not get worse (I know, I should know by now that it can always get worse, but all I have is hope…), it gets worse…much, much [...]

You know that game where you concentrate on some serene scene or maze and then all of a sudden a scary figure jumps out and scares the bejesuses out of you?

Well, that’s basically how I feel when I open my email from Hello Kitty fanatics (except I cry afterward instead of laugh). The latest in [...]

What would be worse than a house full of Hello Kitty crap? How about a Hello Kitty House full of Hello Kitty crap?

The hot and humid days of summer are now in full force in Japan and that means having to deal with all the lovely mosquitoes. If you decide to go on a picnic and hike like we did this past weekend, it makes sense to take mosquito repellent with you. To my regret, I made [...]

It has been well established that Hello Kitty fanatics don’t need to have any use for a Hello Kitty product to still lust after it and decide that they need to add it to their collection. My wife doesn’t play any musical instrument, but that has not stopped her from collecting a small symphony of [...]

The thing about living in Hello Kitty Hell is that you can never make a simple request and not have the evil feline right there to haunt you. You would assume that if you asked your significant other if they could hand you a toothpick, you would get a normal wood toothpick. Not in Hello [...]

You knew that this day would come. Not only does Hello Kitty want to sell you computers (such as this, this and this) in her evil feline image, she now also wants to protect your computer from the inside as well with her new Hello Kitty antivirus and firewall software (while it is currently only [...]

Once again Hello Kitty shows that there are no boundaries when it comes to combinations of herself and other things no matter how wrong the combination may seem to the rest of us. This can be seen vividly in things like the Hello Kitty Jesus tattoo, the Hello Kitty Darth Vader tattoo and this Hello [...]