Hello Kitty Hell

If you really had any doubt (and if you have been to this blog, that certainly is not the case) about how prevalent the evil feline is in the world, this Hello Kitty “Wonderful World of Hello Kitty” graphic should thoroughly depress you for the next few years (click on image to enlarge at your [...]

One thing that you learn quickly when you live with a Hello Kitty fanatic is that you are never safe from the evil feline when traveling. That’s because no matter where in the world you might be, there is a good chance that a Hello Kitty store exists — and the one universal truth for [...]

I have no doubt that Hello Kitty will be the death of me. One day the sweetness will become so overwhelming that I will find myself trying to get it out of my system by slicing my wrists. Apparently the evil feline wants to give me a choice when this time comes: I can go [...]

Hello Kitty, as has been well established, is disturbing just being herself. It gets more disturbing when people feel it necessary to write books about her. Then it gets even worse when people get a huge crowd to listen to a lecture about a book about Hello Kitty. Basically, it’s everything that you never wanted [...]

The truth finally slips out in a 35th Anniversary Mad Scientist display in Macau. Called Hello Kitty Evolution, we see the way that the evil feline spreads her paws to Kittify one place after another (click on image to enlarge):

I should have learned by now that it’s never a good idea to make a random comment about something I want since I live in Hello Kitty Hell. I have been doing more traveling lately which has had me thinking that I really need to buy a netbook so I don’t have to haul around [...]

While it’s never good when Hello Kitty shows up on TV, it is double troubling when she shows up in a political debate on TV. When your political leaders feel it’s necessary to use Hello Kitty to make any point, you know it’s pretty much time to give up on the world ever being a [...]

You really don’t know Hello Kitty Hell until a true Hello Kitty fanatic is in your presence on a daily basis. Imagine, for instance, that you had a co-worker that was a Hello Kitty fanatic. You might be saying to yourself, “oh, I know someone that likes the evil feline” but they really aren’t a [...]

One of the worst things about Hello Kitty is the sheer abundance of terribly annoying crap that the evil feline produces. A perfect example of this is the Hello Kitty hole punch:

Well, you can’t say that Sanrio doesn’t beat themes to death when they know that Hello kitty fanatics will line up to buy the most useless things. With Hello Kitty fanatics already purchasing the Hello Kitty gold business card, the Hello Kitty gold personal business card and even a set of Hello Kitty gold playing [...]

This really shouldn’t come as a surprise. I mean, you can already get Hello Kitty credit cards and Hello Kitty checks, so it really isn’t that far of a reach to combine them together, throw in some exclusive stationary and watch the Hello Kitty fanatics come stampeding to the doors to open up a Hello [...]

I have come to the conclusion that one of the most important skill sets when you live in Hello Kitty Hell is to learn how to keep your mouth shut on things you need and buy them yourself. While I have become quite good at this over the years, every once in awhile I slip [...]

You knew that Sanrio wouldn’t stop at one – it’s not in their character to fail to beat something to complete death when there are Hello Kitty fanatics ready to pay out big dollars for useless crap. To help celebrate the 33rd anniversary of Hello Kitty (like they really need an excuse to launch this [...]

When I first saw this, I thought I might have some fun making it go down long flights of stairs until it eventually showed the wear and tear of countless missteps along the way. No such luck because it isn’t a Hello Kitty slinky:

but a Hello Kitty letter holder. So instead of getting to [...]

Even though we live in Japan where checks are not accepted, my wife had to have these (surprise, surprise).

Even worse, when we move back to the US, I will likely be forced to use these patterns (mental note to self: don’t ask wife to order checks for me). I can already imagine how manly [...]

This is why Hello Kitty brings hell to the spouses of Hello Kitty fanatics. It’s bad enough that my wife “had to have” the Hello Kitty Gold business card. The problem is once you have the outrageously expensive business card, where do you keep it? In an outrageously expensive Hello Kitty business card holder, of [...]

There are useless pieces of Hello Kitty crap and then there are truly useless pieces of Hello Kitty crap. While I cringe no matter what new Hello Kitty item is going to be added to my wife’s Hello Kitty collection, it’s things like this that makes me know that the people at Sanrio basically decide [...]