Hello Kitty Hell

One of the worst things about Hello Kitty is the sheer abundance of terribly annoying crap that the evil feline produces. A perfect example of this is the Hello Kitty hole punch:

It should be no surprise that Hello Kitty will Kittify anything sweet since there are already confectionery shops devoted to the evil feline. So I really should have been more prepared when the Hello Kitty ice-cream arrived at our house the other day:

In a continuing sign that all is not right in the world, people still believe for some unfathomable reason that it’s a good idea to combine Hello Kitty and other anime characters into tattoos — which only produces Hello Kitty Hellish results. There isn’t much more you can say about something like the Hello Kitty [...]

I should have known that Hello Kitty Hell would not let me off that easily. After receiving over 20 emails yesterday about this I thought I could avoid the entire thing by placing a small blurb at the end of a post saying that I was aware and that everyone that visits here can stop [...]

I know that things are getting bad in Hello Kitty Hell when the transformer Hello Kitty sewing machine doesn’t seem quite as bad as I first thought. What could get me thinking this way? The Hello Kitty face sewing machine, of course:

If I ever came across this on the street, I think I would simply jump in front of a car and get the pain over once and for all. I don’t think there is a whole lot more to say about the the Hello Kitty nun costume:

My wife now wants to fly to New York this summer. Take one guess why? It seems that Tom Sachs has put up some giant Hello Kitty and friend statues in New York for the summer including a 18,000 pounds, 21-foot-tall Hello Kitty and a Hello Kitty water fountain:

I know that it’s going to be a Hello Kitty Hellish week when my wife comes up to me with a huge smile on her face, her hands behind her back and asks me the dreaded question, “Guess what I have for you?” At that point I usually think that it would be a lot [...]

What, exactly, is it with Hello Kitty fanatics, tattoos and combining things that never should be combined? (Plenty of examples for your torment). Let me introduce you to yet another one — the Hello Kitty Skuterrfly tattoo:

In Hello Kitty Hell one would imagine that it couldn’t get worse than having Hello Kitty on every shelf constantly staring back at you in your home, but then that would be once again underestimating the evil feline. Now I have to constantly watch where I walk so that I don’t trip over my wife’s [...]

When things like this arrive in my mailbox, I know that it’s going to be a Hello Kitty Hell week that will not go well. It’s bad enough that I have Hello Kitty living all around me, but the thought just got a whole lot worse – Hello Kitty may actually be living inside me [...]

Getting a Hello Kitty tattoo is bad, getting one right smack front and center of your forehead pretty much assures that you have – how should I say this diplomatically – lost your damn mind (my theory is that Sanrio has invented a Hello Kitty virus that makes people do things like this…):

If you had any doubt that no place was safe from the claws of Hello Kitty, that doubt may now be put to rest. Hello Kitty has managed to wriggle her way into a lot of places she isn’t wanted, but I figured there were a few places that would never take to her – [...]