Hello Kitty Cell Phone
My wife finally got herself a Hello Kitty cell phone, but since the official Hello Kitty cell phones weren’t Hello Kittified enough for her taste, she instead had this monstrosity custom made:
Since I don’t have a cell phone, my wife insisted that I take hers when I went out shopping yesterday in case she thought of some other things to add to the list she had given me. There’s definitely a Hello Kitty Hell law that states that when someone is living in Hello Kitty Hell and is forced to take some Hello Kitty branded item with them, the moment that that item will need to be used will be at the most embarrassing moment possible. Thus the phone rang right at the moment that I was in the most crowded section of the grocery store.
There is nothing that exudes “strange foreigner” in Japan more than a six foot three inch tall guy taking out a hideously blinged out Hello Kitty cell phone that is playing the Hello Kitty theme song as the ringtone in the middle of a crowded grocery store and having to explain that, “no, I am not lying and pretending I can’t find the Hello Kitty sausages you wanted. They aren’t here” and “yes, I do agree (because I don’t want to sleep in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag tonight) that Hello Kitty pancakes are wonderful and it is also beyond me why the grocery store doesn’t stock Hello Kitty brand pancake mix.”
After talking and hanging up, I of course have every single mother and child in that area of the store looking at me with a raised eyebrow trying to decide if I am just a weird foreigner that likes Hello Kitty or some freaked out lunatic that has no grasp of the reality that grown men don’t have Hello Kitty cell phones (with the latter usually winning out). I immediately sulk away where upon the phone rings again and the entire process starts anew.
And the sad part is that is nothing unusual for a day in Hello Kitty Hell…
Posted: August 24th, 2007 under Hello Kitty Fashion, Hello Kitty Gadgets.
Comments: 61
Comments
Comment from Jessi
Time: August 24, 2007, 6:37 am
Wow, you really DO live in HK hell. I’m a huge fan of HK, but even I would be embarassed beyond belief if I had to carry that thing around. You are a strong man.
Comment from yet another anonymous
Time: August 24, 2007, 8:06 am
I thought cell phones are invisible leashes (mostly used by wives to reach their housbands anytime they need). But I didn’t realize that cell phones can be torture tools. Well, Hello Kitty Armband of Shame is also based on the same concept.
Comment from Melissa
Time: August 24, 2007, 8:16 am
wow.
that SERIOUSLY sucks. talk about embarassing.
Comment from YTSL
Time: August 24, 2007, 9:19 am
The way you write about your wife sometimes, I wonder whether a divorce is imminent… 
Comment from mal
Time: August 24, 2007, 9:28 am
hhaha cool. how much did ur wife spent on that.
Comment from Dawn
Time: August 24, 2007, 10:17 am
ROTFL - My sides hurt!
Think you will look back on this and laugh one day?
My gawd, that was funny.
Comment from Melissa
Time: August 24, 2007, 10:44 am
I love Hello Kitty but that phone is just tacky! Woof! You poor thing!
Comment from Cat Lady
Time: August 24, 2007, 11:07 am
That is by far one of the tackiest things I’ve seen in a very long time.
You have my sympathy for having to use that monstrosity in public.
I’m just going to go bleach my eyes now.
Comment from oh damn its jenn
Time: August 24, 2007, 12:18 pm
im gonna pray to baby jesus for you
xD
Comment from danielle
Time: August 24, 2007, 2:43 pm
I like HK, but….I’m not THAT obsessed. I would NEVER use that!!
Comment from Jam
Time: August 24, 2007, 5:12 pm
I wouldn’t be caught carrying that around and I love HK.
Comment from Sparklefluff
Time: August 24, 2007, 6:51 pm
I love it! Where did she get it?
Comment from Raven
Time: August 24, 2007, 8:01 pm
Hello Kitty Hell Phone.
Comment from Tiffany
Time: August 25, 2007, 6:49 am
Oh what a lovely idea, a Hello Kitty personlised Hello Kitty Cell Phone. You could even hide a Hello Kitty Super Sweet Sugar Suprize car Air Freshener inside the layers of glittery gems and ribbons to give your Hello Kitty personlised Hello Kitty Cell Phone the sweet smell of Hello Kitty domination, Oh my toes tingle in there pink Hello Kitty socks smothered by my Hello Kitty house slippers at the very thought! Hehe!
Comment from Que
Time: August 25, 2007, 9:43 am
I like Hello Kitty as much as the next Asian girl, but that is hideous.
Comment from Vix
Time: August 25, 2007, 11:43 am
That is sickeningly shiny. Too much!
A thought. Why don’t you feign interest in other Sanrio Characters like Chococat, Keroppi or Badtz Maru? While it may not get you out of Hello Kitty Hell, it can ease it a bit, as you won’t have to carry a Kitty phone, use Kitty sleeping bag, etc. At least those guys are male?
Comment from Miss_Ashley
Time: August 25, 2007, 12:13 pm
HAHAHAHA u know i wanted feedback from this site because its so freakin funny what ur wife does to u. But before i read this i skimmed through a couple of posts and i was like WOW CAN I BE YOUR WIFE!?!?!?! HAHAHAHHA i LOVE all the cute hello kitty things but ur wife does seem to OD on her LOL but i LOVE what u write about the things she finds, wants, and buys. HAHAHAHAHA the hello kitty sleeping bag HAHAHA so funny man if u ever put all these post together and make a book please send me an autographed copy cause this stuff is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO amusing and hella funny! HAHAHA umm my last words for this post? good luck in the future? maybe her credit card be unlimited? or limited in ur case? LMAO. well good luck ^.~
~*AsH*~
P.S. can’t wait for the next post i love it hahahah
Comment from iva
Time: August 25, 2007, 4:44 pm
Some hello kitty items are ok
I am not a fan though
That cell phone is a bit too much for my eyes…:P
Comment from Tamara
Time: August 26, 2007, 8:14 am
I did something similar with my phone only it’s a pink moto razor. My boyfriend hates using my cell phone but if his wasn’t dying all the time he wouldn’t have to.
Pingback from Hello Kitty Cell Phone Charger: Hello Kitty Hell
Time: August 27, 2007, 12:02 am
[…] that certainly didn’t take long. Now that my wife has her blinged out Hello Kitty cell phone, she has decided that she needs to increase the number of Hello Kitty cell phone accessories she […]
Comment from Lolly
Time: August 27, 2007, 7:39 am
I have been reading your blog for a few months, but only now do I fully realize the full extent of the HK hell you live in.
Haaa Haaa Haaa Haaa!
Comment from Catherine
Time: August 27, 2007, 9:36 pm
That thing looks more like a cheap crappy toy than a cell phone.
I like Hello Kitty stuff, but not to THAT extent… perhaps your wife should relearn the the concept of “all things in moderation” 
P.S. Dunno if you or your wife’s seen it, but there is a short documentary out there on the net about this guy and his collection of HK stuff–after watching this years ago it creeped me out a bit.
Here’s the link (and may I burn in hell for letting you know 
)
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=1864840
Cheers,
Catherine
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Time: August 27, 2007, 11:23 pm
[…] Kitty Hell presents The Dangers of a Hello Kitty Cell Phone at Hello Kitty Hell. The world famous Hello Kitty merchandise…good if you like them, horror […]
Comment from Goodbye Kittie
Time: August 28, 2007, 8:50 am
‘ Each man has the dream he deserves ‘ Beaudelaire wrote .
Lucky for him he was only on heroine lol
It never stops for you , does it ?
No escaping it on a hello kittie scooter either
Comment from acklesgrl
Time: August 28, 2007, 3:27 pm
This site cracks me up, but this entry is by far my favorite.. LOL
Comment from Corey
Time: August 29, 2007, 4:10 pm
OMG this killed me! I have to go read more of you stuff. tooooo funny!
Comment from Nikki
Time: August 31, 2007, 7:11 am
This phone is adorable!! I love it! ^_^
Comment from Meredith
Time: September 2, 2007, 7:09 pm
I didn’t realize you live in Japan!
Comment from Yanpa
Time: September 4, 2007, 1:27 am
What no-one seems to have picked up on is the mention of Hello Kitty sausages. Would it be too optimistic to presume these are the result of putting various Hello Kitty objects through a mincer?
Comment from Elfkin
Time: September 4, 2007, 10:48 pm
I like HK.
Heck, I LOVE HK.
But that’s so far beyond the limit.
You poor man, truly a Hello Kitty Hell. D:
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Time: September 11, 2007, 9:06 am
[…] didn’t take long for my wife to find something to match her hideously Hello Kitty pimped out cell phone that she is trying to convince me that I need because it comes with a “blog” function […]
Comment from ari-el
Time: September 26, 2007, 3:00 am
A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E! I WANT ONE OF THAT PHONES!
Pingback from Hello Kitty Sausages - Hello Kitty Hell
Time: October 2, 2007, 2:59 am
[…] may remember me telling you about the pimped out Hello Kitty cell phone that my wife had made and my embarrassing experience in the grocery store with it a couple of […]
Comment from abs :D
Time: October 7, 2007, 2:37 pm
im obsessed, but dear lord.
thats just tacky.
i would love to take your place
hello kitty is ah-mazing.
Comment from Amanda
Time: November 2, 2007, 8:29 am
I love HK but this one is tooooo …… I don’t have any words for it
Comment from Laisa
Time: November 7, 2007, 12:21 pm
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=3442no2&s=2
There’s a few more. I’m SO sorry.
Comment from Lorelei
Time: November 19, 2007, 5:21 am
Pure fug.
Comment from hktoadprincess
Time: November 21, 2007, 9:03 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. This is good stuff. I love you ! HAHAHAHA!! You are great.
Comment from Reeka
Time: December 5, 2007, 8:09 am
This is fabulous-what company made this for you? I’d love for mine to be personaly made into HK as well!
Comment from Maddie Cullen
Time: December 5, 2007, 3:46 pm
OMGOODNESS!!!!!! Ok… well.. actually… I love it… sadly. except i am NOT a Hello Kitty fan.. I’m a Chococat fan… So i would do that to my cellphone Chococat style. I’m suck a dork.
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Time: December 5, 2007, 9:13 pm
[…] is with Hello Kitty and Swarovski crystals, but this is definitely a Hello Kitty fanatic thing (see my wife’s modded cell phone). I think that Sanrio and Swarovski have secretly teamed up after discovering some special region […]
Comment from Courtney
Time: December 6, 2007, 12:43 am
that thing is soooooo ugly. This coming from a hello kittyaholic! what’s up with the roses? that is just too much and too tacky for words.
Comment from k
Time: December 6, 2007, 8:08 pm
My deepest apologies, any woman who loves her husband would not torture him like that. And you puting up with it shows me that you realy adore your wife.
Comment from Yami
Time: December 13, 2007, 10:10 am
Dear god..theres a phone under all that bling somewhere?
Comment from Devynn
Time: December 14, 2007, 12:12 am
that’s too much for me, but kudos on her originality! i tried to bling out one of my phones, didn’t work as well. so i just saved my money and got the okwap a236 HK ltd ed. i *heart* it! i’m lucky that my husband and i have our own personal phones and that they will NEVER be the same (he likes basic black and i tend to go for pink or red). no one loses their phone and all is well. ‘course his boss wouldn’t be happy if he was sans phone, so it makes my life easier b/c there’s NO WAY he’s EVER getting mine! :p
Comment from cresmene
Time: February 3, 2008, 1:45 pm
i luv hello kitty my room is filled wit hello kitty by the way just to say im 11 so dont get yur hopes up and i got the same exact phone iluv it so much i even bouth 1 4 a bff jessica!!!!
Comment from Gabrielle
Time: February 7, 2008, 12:03 am
You really don’t have it so bad do you? I mean at least you can make a profit from this blog! My husband is a Marine, while I buy what I can afford in HK, I get everything else in pink. Poor dear has to take my pink laptop to Iraq next month. But then again that cell phone is fug! How does she keep all that crap from falling off? She is really dedicated!
Comment from Shikamru_fangirll
Time: February 12, 2008, 2:12 pm
REBEL AGAINST YOUR WIFE!!!
Seriously, Hello Kitty’s cute but…that was a cruel and bitchy thing to do, why couldn’t she go shopping I might ask.
Comment from LeahBeast
Time: February 21, 2008, 9:01 pm
ew… she really didnt design it well….
Comment from shamanda
Time: March 1, 2008, 11:07 am
I want one! Sorry 4 u but I love it! How can I get it?!
Comment from Samm
Time: March 12, 2008, 10:31 pm
i love hello kitty, but this is just hideous.
no offense to your wife.
Comment from miso cute
Time: March 18, 2008, 3:54 am
OMG WHERE DID SHE GET THE PHONE?!!?!?
Pingback from Hello Kitty Lunch Bags - Hello Kitty Hell
Time: March 25, 2008, 1:03 am
[…] male walking down the streets in Japan with a Hello Kitty lunch bag in your hand (well, besides taking the Hello Kitty cell phone to the supermarket…). Basically, it sums up the daily embarrassment that come with living in Hello Kitty […]
Comment from amy
Time: April 5, 2008, 2:29 am
it’s orrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comment from Jenna
Time: April 7, 2008, 6:43 am
hahahahaha!
talk about some major bling.
Comment from amy
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:10 am
ORRIBLE ORRIBLE ORRIBLE ORRIBLE
Comment from Assal
Time: April 15, 2008, 4:20 am
WOW WOW WOW
i’d love it!!!!!
Comment from Kimiko
Time: April 17, 2008, 12:37 am
….im hissing @ my computer monitor right now…….its that appauling >=|
Comment from Ki
Time: May 3, 2008, 5:00 pm
oh thats so so funny but i luv hello kitty im looking for a HELLO KITTY cell phone (im only 10)
Comment from miriam
Time: May 9, 2008, 6:47 am
ewwwwwwwwwww…. ORRIBLE ORRIBLE ORRIBLE ORRIBLE……..is soooooo ugly…
Comment from sophie
Time: May 13, 2008, 8:54 am
do you like hate hello kitty or something i have hello kitty room!
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