Hello Kitty Hell

The people at Sanrio seem to do everything in their power to make my life miserable in winter. The pink set arrived at our house yesterday and is a perfect example to illustrate this point…

One of the many problems of living in Hello Kitty Hell is that there are far too many unexpected (usually of the horrifying variety) surprises. One would assume that the clothes in my closet would be safe from these events, but I found out a few minutes ago that is not the case when I [...]

You would think that once Halloween was over that everyone could feel safe from the horror of having Hello Kitty fanatics dress up as the evil feline. Sanrio, in all their evilness, has other ideas. In an effort to torture all non Hello Kitty fanatics into submission, Sanrio wants to make dressing up as Hello [...]

You know that you have lived in Hello Kitty Hell far too long when you take a look at photos like this and immediately say to yourself, “well at least her face mask isn’t Hello Kitty” when in reality any sane person would be running as fast as they could in the opposite direction in [...]

What is it with Hello Kitty fanatics and Hello Kitty plush fashion? Seriously, it’s one of the most disturbing trends for the simple fact that someone with absolutely no fashion sense can look at it and know instantly that they would never be caught dead in something like that. It’s bad enough that these types [...]

I knew that I would regret posting the Hello Kitty handbag fashion show video. As soon as the video was posted, other Hello Kitty fashion show videos started appearing in my email box (to my disgust, but to the delight of my wife). Among these was a Hello Kitty latex fashion show (possibly nsfw)…

A few more reasons that my sanity is happy that I was able to avoid the entire Three Apples art exhibit and 35th anniversary celebration in person — There was no doubt that the Hello Kitty fanatics would be out in droves with their corresponding hideous Hello Kitty fashion outfits:

Left on twitter by aminerat (via [...]

In yet another example that this Hello Kitty 35th anniversary celebration has gone way past the point of sanity, Sanrio invited Portuguese fashion designer Maria Gambina to create a unique fashion piece – the results being the Hello Kitty burqa:

My wife was already a fan of Lady Gaga due to her Hello Kitty hair bow and visit to Japan where she professed her love of the evil feline. This has only grown as Lady Gaga posed for a Markus & Indrani photo shoot for the Three Apples art collection (yet another reason to avoid [...]

No matter how much a Hello Kitty fanatic wishes it to be true, putting on evil feline plush ears with a bow is not acceptable behavior. Asking your significant other to try them on “just to see how they look” pretty much assures that you are comfortable with him living in Hello Kitty hell…

Sent in [...]

In another attempt to get me in trouble with my wife (which has unfortunately succeeded), I am now officially not allowed to look at any women other than my wife in Hello Kitty bras and underwear. I was tempted to ask for her to make it a 100% ban on looking at any women in [...]

I know it’s going to be a really, really Hello Kitty hellish day when photos like these end up in my email box. I don’t want to know why. I don’t want to know when. I just plain don’t want to know anything about what is going on here. I advise you to turn away [...]

I hate Hello Kitty eye masks. My wife sleeps with them on and there are literally dozens of different patterns on the market. While they help keep the light out of her eyes, they also perpetually have me inches away from dying of a heart attack.
Imagine for a moment that your significant other rolls [...]

A single Hello Kitty bra is disturbing. The fact that stores sell whole racks of them is a pretty good reason to lose faith in the world:

Sent in by Geoff (via Takecrew) which of course begs to ask the question why exactly he was looking at this stuff…

Here’s this week’s Hello Kitty photo dump of photos sent in that didn’t make the front page of this blog:
Hello Kitty Uterus Plush
Hello Kitty Guitar Meow!
Hello Kitty Jelly Belly Jelly Beans
Hello Kitty Cat Litter
Hello Kitty Asics Shoes
Hello Kitty MP3 Player
And a few photo post updates:
Hello Kitty Darth Vader
Hello Kitty Coffee Maker
Hello Kitty Computer Keyboard
Hello Kitty [...]

I received the following question in my email the other day:
What are the worst Hello Kitty products out there?
“Everything?” would be my immediate response. That being said, many of the things that I personally find horrifying never seemed to raise much of a ruckus among the readers here and the Hello Kitty fanatics — well, [...]

Some things were never meant to be made. Hello Kitty was one such thing. Crocs were another. So was there ever really any doubt that the two would be combined to create Hello Kitty crocs?

Hello Kitty is no stranger to extremism, so it seems appropriate that there is a Hello Kitty Jihadist plush out there:

It had to happen. It was bad enough that my wife thought I should be wearing the Hello Kitty low rise underwear, but you can imagine my shock when they arrived at our door in three additional patterns as well:

I know that it’s going to be an extra awful and down right hideous Hello Kitty Hellish day when a photo of Hello Kitty and Paris Hilton combined makes its way into my email box: