Hello Kitty Hell

Sometimes I get emails that simply confirm that the next generation is doomed to live their own hello Kitty Hell. A perfect example of this is Hello Kitty pregnant belly art:

Sometimes when I see new Hello Kitty products, I think that Sanrio must actually be running out of things to Hello Kittify since there is no other explanation as to why some of these things are made. That, and the overwhelming focus that it’s never too early to indoctrinate the child masses into the Sanrio [...]

It’s been well established that Hello Kitty can’t leave anything alone that may be popular that doesn’t have her on it. She co-opts anything and everything and turns what used to be something that could be enjoyed by all into a horrific example of everything that it wrong. Case in point — the Hello Kitty [...]

Once again Hello Kitty Hell proves that it can always get worse…
You knew it had to happen eventually. If Hello Kitty fanatics were willing to place Hello Kitty heads on cats and dogs, it didn’t take much of a leap to know they would eventually do it to their own babies as well:

This is so [...]

I always knew that Hello Kitty was evil, I just didn’t have the proof…until now. It appears that Hello Kitty Bubble Bath would like to give you cancer:

The characters are irresistible to your child, but a new study reveals there’s a suspected human cancer-causing chemical inside millions of bottles of bubbles…
The FDA recommends a maximum [...]

While I do complain a lot about being in Hello Kitty Hell, I know that it will become 1000 times worse if we ever have a baby girl. If we have a baby boy, I’m afraid that he will be scarred for life even before he knows how to talk. But even though we don’t [...]