Hello Kitty Hell

It is a well known fact that Hello Kitty enjoys her drugs (not to mention drug lords). Whether it is Hello Kitty cocaine, Hello Kitty acid or Hello Kitty marijuana, we now know what Hello Kitty enjoys doing when she is taking these drugs with this little memento left on a Hello Kitty pipe — [...]

As difficult as it is to imagine, Hello Kitty fanatics have come up with a way to make even the Hello Kitty wedding ring look like it could be a good option. In their never ending drive to make every guy with even an ounce of sanity stay as far away as possible from them, [...]

For some unfathomable reason, Hello Kitty fanatics feel that it’s appropriate to send me photos of their Hello Kitty collections. Believe me, opening an email filled with photos of a Hello Kitty collection is probably one of the most hellish things that one can ever experience, especially early in the morning or just after a [...]

It was probably inevitable. Once the Hello Kitty pregnant belly art made an appearance, it was simply a matter of time before someone felt the incomprehensible urge to ruin my day by sending me a full set of Hello Kitty body paint photos. Unfortunately, that day has come:

For some reason which I still have not been able to fathom, people feel compelled to ruin my day by sending me photos of their tattoos of the evil feline. It’s as if they believe that their tattoo will somehow convince me that I have somehow misinterpreted my Hello Kitty Hell and all of a [...]

When we know that Hello Kitty toilets, Hello Kitty toilet paper, Hello Kitty toilet paper storage cabinets, Hello Kitty toilet signs, Hello Kitty toilet seats and Hello Kitty toilet dispensers all exist (and how can anyone forget the Hello Kitty urinal target– are we seeing a pattern here yet?), it really isn’t much of a [...]

The problem with Hello Kitty is that no matter what your profession, the evil feline will eventually find a way to infiltrate the way you make your living and permanently scar your sanity in the process. I have no doubt that handymen thought they were safe from the terror of Hello Kitty — oh, how [...]

While there are numerous things that one can say about Hello Kitty fanatics, I guess there is one thing that you can never say. That is that Hello Kitty fanatics don’t provide an ample amount of “wtf?” into the lives of all the sane people in the world. This is especially true when it comes [...]

As if you really needed any additional proof that Hello Kitty fanatics have a warped sense of thinking, you simply have to ask yourself what would you do if you were going to the beach. Most of us would put on some suntan lotion to prevent a sunburn and have a good time, but the [...]

Seriously, the one thing that you quickly realize living in Hello Kitty Hell is that there is no possible way that you can make up the Hello Kitty crap that exists out there. While I am not usually a fan of Hello Kitty merchandise, there are still those rare instances when Hello Kitty goes to [...]