Hello Kitty Eye Mask

I hate Hello Kitty eye masks. My wife sleeps with them on and there are literally dozens of different patterns on the market. While they help keep the light out of her eyes, they also perpetually have me inches away from dying of a heart attack.

Imagine for a moment that your significant other rolls over while you’re fast asleep and gently snuggles against you. Still 90% asleep, you turn over so that you are face to face, place your arms around her in loving fashion. Still mostly asleep, you then slowly open your eyes expecting to see your significant other’s face and this is what greets you. Unfortunately, this is a far too regular occurrence in Hello Kitty Hell…

Hello Kitty eyemask

Hello Kitty eye mask

Sent in by sophia

Update: Another way to ensure that your significant other is traumatized each and every morning:

Hello Kitty eye mask

Hello Kitty sleep mask

Sent in by HK Guy

Hello Kitty MAC Cosmetic Signage

I would basically like to wipe the entire Hello Kitty MAC cosmetic line — and the advertising they did — completely from my mind due to the traumatizing effect it caused that I’m still recovering from. It’s difficult to have a positive outlook on life when you have seen the MAC make-up video and S&M Hello Kitty men. So it is no surprise that the artwork signage for MAC also leaves one shaking their head wondering what type of drugs the people were taking that came up with the entire concept. Maybe they took a few too many tokes from the Hello Kitty Louis Vuitton bong or got hold of some of that Hello Kitty cocaine

Hello Kitty MAC cosmetic sign

Sent in by too many people – stop sending MAC stuff – the campaign is over and let’s leave it that way for everybody’s sanity…

Hello Kitty Pick-Up Truck

Since there are already way too many Hello Kitty cars out there – everything from Smart Cars to minivans – it should be no surprise that a Hello Kitty pick-up truck is roaming the streets terrorizing all those unfortunate enough to see it. I guess it makes sense. The Hello Kitty fanatic needs a place to put her Hello Kitty shotgun

Hello Kitty pick-up truck

Sent in by Miffylv

Hello Kitty Guitar Hero Wii Guitar Mod

One would think that the evil feline would be satisfied after convincing guitar makers to sell their souls and produce both Hello Kitty acoustic guitars and Hello Kitty electric guitars (not to mention what happens when people actually play them or even worse, pretend to play them). This, of course, would be greatly underestimating the lengths that she would go to to try and inflict pain on every person possible and neglect the fact that more and more people are playing Guitar Hero these days. If you are a Wii fan and a Guitar Hero fan (actually, this is good advice to anyone that is breathing), just leave now because you don’t want this haunting you for the rest of the year.

Hello Kitty guitar hero wii mod

Sent in by wiifan

Update: You knew there couldn’t just be one:

hello kitty guitar hero guitar

Left in comments by Ryouga (via Flickr)

Hello Kitty Louis Vuitton Bong

I’m not sure what disturbs me more – that Hello Kitty bongs exist or that there are several variations of them. Apparently, when a standard Hello Kitty bong is not high class enough for some Hello Kitty fanatics, they go out and make something a little more upscale like a Hello Kitty Louis Vuitton bong. With either one, when you get high and see what you’ve been smoking from, I’m pretty sure that you’re in for an very unpleasant experience…

Hello Kitty Louis Vuitton bong

Left in the comments by Harlock

Hello Kitty Stained Glass Window

Any normal person would figure that after my wife had decided on the Hello Kitty house made of Hello Kitty bricks with Hello Kitty plants in front surrounded by the Hello Kitty picket fence and Hello Kitty display cases to keep all her Hello Kitty junk that my wife’s dream house had pretty much reached the point where it could no longer be Hello Kittified. Of course, normal never applies when living in Hello Kitty Hell and the Hello Kitty stained glass window proves this point:

Hello Kitty stained glass window

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Hello Kitty History Video

Hello Kitty, as has been well established, is disturbing just being herself. It gets more disturbing when people feel it necessary to write books about her. Then it gets even worse when people get a huge crowd to listen to a lecture about a book about Hello Kitty. Basically, it’s everything that you never wanted to know about the evil feline — don’t bother watching because it’s 30 minutes of your life you can never get back:

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Hello Kitty Longboard Surfboard

When it comes to the fanatics of the evil feline, price is rarely a consideration. Take for example, this Hello Kitty longboard surfboard (not to be mistaken for the Hello Kitty surfboard). You could get basically the same effect by sticking a bunch of Hello Kitty stickers on the board for a few bucks, but they would eventually wear off (all the more reason, in my opinion, to use this approach if you for some reason momentarily lose all common sense and actually think Hello Kitty on a surfboard is a good idea). Instead, this surfboard had the Hello Kitty laminates placed under the fiberglass for about $1200. I guess you could argue it’s a good shark repellent…

Hello Kitty longboard surfboard

Sent in by ram