Hello Kitty Hell

What exactly is it with men and Hello Kitty tattoos these days? It is certainly not a good sign in Hello Kitty Hell when more and more are showing up in my mailbox such as this one:

We have yet another person getting a Hello Kitty tattoo who doesn’t know the difference between Hello Kitty and [...]

Stop! Take your hand off the mouse and don’t even think of clicking the “send” on the email to let me know about Hello Kitty for Men – yes, I’m fully aware that they exist and (unfortunately), I have for a few months now:

While the entire concept of Hello Kitty for men is disturbing, the [...]

Because if there is one thing that Hello Kitty can never have enough of, especially with her philosophy of love and friendship, it’s military style weapons:

Once again, we see Hello Kitty showing her true colors and what her true heart is all about. You know that there’s something seriously wrong when Hello Kitty has enough [...]

While everything Hello Kitty freaks me out, there are definitely some Hello Kitty items that freak me out more than others. It’s stuff like this that is definitely on the high end of freaking me out list – Hello Kitty contacts:

While it is fairly obvious that Sanrio has figured out a way to possess Hello [...]

If people insist on sending me Hello Kitty related emails, fan art is preferable over Hello Kitty items that are just bound to make my life more of a living (Hello Kitty) hell once my wife sees them. Here is the latest piece of fan art sent in:

It came with the following message:
Alright, I drew [...]

I should have known that it was going to get worse (this is, after all, Hello Kitty Hell where things always get worse no matter how bad they may seem). Thus we move from the Hello Kitty pink Christmas tree to the Hello Kitty Plush Christmas tree:

Of course, my wife loves both and is [...]

The fact that Sanrio makes a Hello Kitty douche pretty much assured that a Hello Kitty deodorant existed and now, of course, my wife is looking for it.

There are a couple classic signs that it is Hello Kitty. It’s marked “limited edition” at the top – who else besides Sanrio would come up with the [...]

You would think that there would be a law against this, especially during the holidays. I mean, seriously, how could anyone really view this as a good idea? (then again, I guess you could make that argument with virtually any Hello Kitty product…)

There is nothing that says Christmas spirit like a tree covered in Pepto [...]

You know it’s going to be another Hello Kitty Hellish day when an email with photos like this arrives – the Hello Kitty lantern festival:

The second my wife saw these photos, she wanted to go. My mentioning that since the photos were posted online, it probably meant that the festival was already over (hoping beyond [...]

Yes, we already know that Hello Kitty has a things for guns including AK47s and Armoured Personnel Carriers so it’s really no surprise that she would come out with another assault rifle:

On the surface, a Hello Kitty gun just seems wrong (but then again, anything Hello Kitty could fit that description). But with a little [...]

The things about Hello Kitty fanatics is that they take something Hello Kitty that is already unbearable like the Hello Kitty hotel room (which one would assume could never get any worse) and combine it into a video with a song that takes it to as yet unknown nauseating level (warning: play the video at [...]

It’s stuff like this that scares the freaking Hello Kitty Hell out of me. I knew I was going to have nightmares as soon as I read the first sentence of this post:
“Have you ever felt the weird urge to be like Hello Kitty?”
Of course, now it’s like a train wreck. I know I [...]

If you are a non Hello Kitty fanatic, you probably can’t conceive of anything worse than flying on a Hello Kitty airplane for the holidays, but when it comes to the Hell that Hello Kitty places all Hello Kitty fanatic partners into, a Hello Kitty airplane would never suffice. If you’re going to go to [...]

Another doomed man to Hello Kitty Hell that has no idea what he has gotten himself into…

The problem with Hello Kitty fanatics is that they are perfectly willing to humiliate their partner and place them into the depths of Hello Kitty Hell from day one and see absolutely nothing wrong with it (because wouldn’t everybody [...]

He’s doomed…
I too am a fellow sufferer in the depths of hello kitty hell. my fiance is a hello kitty fanatic of the highest caliber. (we are going to honeymoon in Japan, see if you can guess why)
I find myself torn between the love of my fiance and my hatred toward hello kitty. I’m a [...]

Oh, you don’t think it would stop at a single Halloween costume sent to me in December, would you?

Of course not, this is Hello Kitty Hell. Once again we see Hello Kitty fanatics that are dressing up like Hello Kitty’s twin sister Mimmy (you know that Hello Kitty Hell is reaching all time lows [...]

Yes, it’s December and I’m still getting Halloween costume photos sent to me:

I took one look at this and thought, “You know, this looks like a torture device that they would use on terrorists to suffocate them into submission” and the minute I did, it occured to me that is exactly what Hello Kitty does…combine [...]

There really should be some kind of law that people can’t get personalized license plates like this:

Of course, my wife wants one for our always increasingly Hello Kitty pimped out car (I’ve been avoiding writing about it lately because it is getting so depressing), but luck is on my side on this one — they [...]

The flow of Hello Kitty tattoos into my email box continues unabated for reasons I cannot fathom other than Hello Kitty fanatics think it is fun to nauseate me on a regular basis. The latest in the growing list is a Hello Kitty candy tattoo:

I like sweets as much as the next person, but you [...]

It’s when I receive emails like this that I know it’s really going to be a Hello Kitty Hell day. I’ve noticed a growing trend of Hello Kitty fanatics modding their stuff so that they can have the only (and most expensive) of that certain kind of item. Thus it was not a surprise (although [...]